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Thread: Chalkboard, Billboard, and Couch Gag Thread!



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  1. #61
    laughing time is ovah! Henrik P's Avatar
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    Shorts are not food.
    I am not a character from a TV show.

    ^ Best I could make. :P

  2. #62
    I'm baaaack! Patches O'houlihan's Avatar
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    I will not complain about the crap served at lunch.

    I cannot bribe a teacher in public.
    Well, ya'know if you stay positive and forget about trivial things like "proper characterization," "Satire," and "emotional depth" watching new Simpsons episodes can be a seemingly enjoyable lie.

    I tried watching a new episode the Simpsons, but I realized the show hit a new low, like a brand new, underground parking structure of sadness.

  3. #63
    big bad Bartolo sung's Avatar
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    I Will Not Lie About Lunch Ingredients
    A Mixture Of Dirt And Viagra Is Not A Miracle Cure
    I'm Not Bold As Love
    Last edited by sung; 09-22-2006 at 08:53 PM.
    calmer than you are

  4. #64
    has it garret's Avatar
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    I will not cause the other children to revolt against pants.

  5. #65
    laughing time is ovah! Henrik P's Avatar
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    Gambling is not legal at school.
    I am not George Bush's long lost son.

  6. #66
    I'm baaaack! Patches O'houlihan's Avatar
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    "Groening" has nothing to do with Wood

  7. #67
    big bad Bartolo sung's Avatar
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    Wearing An Isotopes Uniform Doesn't Mean You Are A Player Of Them

    Wearing A Fake Chest Hair Toupee Doesn't Make You Look Sexy

    The Rock That I Dug Out On The School Yard Wasn't The Skull Of Jimmy Hoffa

  8. #68
    Marksman-Flying Hellfish Fionn's Avatar
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    'I will not insult the prophet Muhammed, peace be upon him."

    "I am not the man with a plan."

    "I will not meddle with the space-time continuum."

    "The word 'pants' is not inherently funny"
    "The Fightin'est Squad in the Fightin'est Division in the Third Fightin'est Battalion in the Army!"

  9. #69
    this is some friendly Charlie's Avatar
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    "I am not known outside of Springfield"
    Last edited by Zeus; Today at 12:00 PM. Reason: to fuck with you

  10. #70
    I'm baaaack! Patches O'houlihan's Avatar
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    I do not have a Flatulence Range.

    I will not phone a friend during tests.

    There IS a spoon.

  11. #71
    Come back, Zinc!! Sniper Squirrel's Avatar
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    I will not attempt to find the "brown note" during band class
    I'm just like Krusty!
    I'm Krusty, who are you? by NoHomers.net

    Backdoor Sluts 9 makes Crotch Capers 3 look like Naughty Nurses 2

  12. #72
    But what is the Question?
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    Chuck Norris is not overrated...
    There are no motherf***ing snakes in the motherf***ing classroom...
    That Norwegian Blue parrot is not dead...
    A woodchuck cannot chuck wood, therefore the question is irrelevant...
    Sideshow Bob is not a radio psychiatrist in Seattle...
    I am not a lumberjack, and I am not okay...
    I have never "Jumped the Shark"...
    42 is always the answer...

  13. #73
    big bad Bartolo sung's Avatar
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    Gymnasium is not a fantasy 'Itchy And Scratchy' world.

    I will not fill the water in Mrs. Krabappel's skirt to swim on it.

    'Poopy' is not a nickname for Ralph

  14. #74
    Banned
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    My Mom Is Not Wonder Woman
    A "D" Grade Does Not Mean Distinction
    Being 44 And A Virgin Is Not Funny
    My Dad Did Not Eat My Homework
    I Will Not Pull Martins Pants Down In The School Play
    Groundskeeper Willie Did Not Wrestle The Lach Ness Monster
    The Flinstones Ripped Off The Honeymooners
    Family Guy Was Not Cancelled Because I said so.
    Matt Groening Is Not A Fa.. (Gets Cut Off On The Chalkboard)

  15. #75
    Stonecutter
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    Four weddings do not need a funeral
    "Bart Academy" is not a real school
    An ASBO is not something to be proud of

  16. #76
    Banned
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    He Doesnt Look A Thing Like Jesus, But He Talks Like A Gentlemen, Like you remember when you were young.


    Lol, super long

  17. #77
    I'm baaaack! Patches O'houlihan's Avatar
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    School Prayer doesn't work on tests.

  18. #78
    Pretentious Nonsense Sparks's Avatar
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    Freedom fries are not free.
    I will conserve the chalk that is so integral to the chalkboard and by extenstion the school and learning process.
    I am not the eggman.
    A book report on To Kill a Mockingbird should not involve a BB gun.
    There's a thin line between clever and stupid...
    Take that, Lisa's beliefs!

  19. #79
    big bad Bartolo sung's Avatar
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    I will not spray itchy powder during show and tell.

    I will not write 'BYOB' in school festival fly paper.

    'WTF' doesn't mean 'Wednesday, Thursday, Friday'-therefore, it's inappropriate.

    Mrs. Skinner doesn't pack Principal Skinner's lunch

    The school don't close in Chinese New Year's Day

  20. #80
    Pretentious Nonsense Sparks's Avatar
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    I will not undermine the adults of Springfield.

  21. #81
    Purple Monkey Dishwasher Lionel Mclure's Avatar
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    Family Guy is not a rip-off of my family
    There is not a movie featuring me coming out on 06/07/07
    I have never said "Cowabunga" in my life
    Oh please, this is senseless destruction, with none of my usual social commentary
    -Bart Simpson

    We can't bust heads like we used to, but we have our ways. One of them is to tell 'em stories that don't go anywhere.Like the time I caught the ferry to Shelbyville? I needed a new heel for m'shoe. So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what we called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt-which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days nickels had pictures of bumblebees on them. "Gimme five bees for a quarter,"you'd say. Now where were we? Oh yeah. The important thing was I had an onion tied to my belt-which was the style at the time. They didn't have white onions because of the war. All you could get was those big yellow ones....

  22. #82


    "the amazing race" wasn't executive produced by Hitler
    I will not rest until I am a writer for the Simpsons Movie 2.

  23. #83
    I'm baaaack! Patches O'houlihan's Avatar
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    A College Diploma is not a fancy I.O.U.

  24. #84
    HERE COME THE DRUMS! Chief Simpson's Avatar
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    Feet are not made of cheese.
    A response to the YouTube video, 'Family Guy Steals From The Simpsons' - Funniest thing I've ever read.
    If you guys didn't notice, Family Guy was produced by the same person that made the Simpsons.
    You can't steal from yourself, therefore, Family Guy can't steal from the Simpsons

  25. #85
    AllTheMuckThat'sFitToRake Lardlad!'s Avatar
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    I will not appear on the Jerry Springer show
    The wars of the future will not be fought on the battlefield or at sea.
    They will be fought in space, or possibly on top of a very tall
    mountain. In either case, most of the actual fighting will be done by
    small robots. And as you go forth today remember always your duty is
    clear: To build and maintain those robots. Thank you.

  26. #86
    I'm baaaack! Patches O'houlihan's Avatar
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    "Hannah" is not the capital of Montanna.

  27. #87
    I'm baaaack! Patches O'houlihan's Avatar
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    I Will Not Blame lack of School Funding for my F.

  28. #88
    dieing of loneliness Game Player's Avatar
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    i will not pee in the water fountian...
    anymore.

  29. #89
    dieing of loneliness Game Player's Avatar
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    oh and

    i will not spray paint every where i go

    (big el barto picture)

    see it's el barto not me.

  30. #90
    AddminisGator Gatorgod's Avatar
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    I will open the window next time I'm asked to clap out the chalk erasers




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