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Thread: Let's just randomly post funny quotes



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  1. #721
    Temporary Talking Head Suomynona's Avatar
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    DANCE. DANCE. DANCE. DANCE.


    ALALALALALALALA

  2. #722
    Junior Camper JoeyShabadooJr.'s Avatar
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  3. #723
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JoeyShabadooJr. View Post
    : Homer, would you please stop reading that Ross Perot pamphlet?



  4. #724
    Junior Camper JoeyShabadooJr.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by angeldeb82 View Post
    : Homer, would you please stop reading that Ross Perot pamphlet?

    Such an esoteric joke, that nobody every references because it's so absurd and forgotten.

  5. #725
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Jacqueline: Why, Monty, you're the devil himself.
    Mr Burns: WHO TOLD YOU THA- oh yes. Excellent.

  6. Thumbs Up To This Post by: Monty

  7. #726
    Release the Hounds Shoskin's Avatar
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    I posted it somewhere else but it makes me laugh. Probably since I grew up Catholic:

    Saint Peter: "Sean, you wanker."
    Father Sean: "He says."
    Saint Peter: "Repent of your wicked ways or sod off."[He spits on Father Sean and disappears, revealing he was just a streetlight.]
    Father Sean: "Then he gobbed in my face and turned back into a streetlight."
    "Bart, a woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you’d step over your own mother just to get one!"

  8. #727
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Bart: Ugh, daytime TV is muy estupido!

  9. #728


    "Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun!"

    –Mr. Burns, 1995

  10. #729
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : Telegram for Lisa Simpson! [pretends to open envelope]
    : Don't listen! It's a trick!
    : "Dear Lisa, Psyche! Psyche, psyche, psyche! Signed, Super Psyche."
    : I think he's trying to psyche you out.
    : Look, we're all trying to have dinner, so why don't we just psyche, psyche, psyche!

  11. #730


    Mr. Burns: "A show about a doll?? Why not write a musical about the common cat? Or the king of Siam? [sarcastic] Give it up, Smithers."

  12. #731
    Professional Teleporter Mícheál's Avatar
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    Bart [to Lisa]: So what are you changing your name to when you're older?
    "I may or may not die young. I haven't decided yet."

  13. #732
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Robert Goulet: Are you sure this is the casino? I think I should call my manager.
    Nelson: [brandishes his fist at Goulet] Your manager tells you to SHUT UP!
    Goulet: Vera said that?

  14. #733
    Junior Camper Lenzar's Avatar
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    Milhouse: It smells funny in there.
    Homer: No it doesn't.

    (My 4 year old finds this hilarious!)

  15. #734
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Homer: [talking on a phone] Hello, police, can you send a S.W.A.T. team to 742 Evergreen--
    Officer Wiggum: Forget it, Simpson! Those pig noises you made really hurt my feelings... looking like a pig as I do.
    Homer: But you have so much inner beauty.
    Officer Wiggum: Well, um, be that as it may, um, the gang is wanted in eight other states and we have a little saying around here: "Let Michigan handle it".

  16. #735
    Professional Teleporter Mícheál's Avatar
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    Bart: Dad, how did you ever get a woman like mom to stay with you?

    Homer: Look in the mirror, unplanned miracle!

  17. #736
    the protagonist of reality Two Guys, a Girl, and a kat's Avatar
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    : rental plan
    Quote Originally Posted by Spamtasm View Post

  18. #737
    Professional Teleporter Mícheál's Avatar
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    I AM THE LIZARD QUEEN!

  19. #738
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    I got a bratty brother,
    He bugs me every day.
    And this morning my own mother,
    She gave my last cupcake away.
    My dad acts like he belongs,
    He belongs in the zoo.
    I'm the saddest kid in grade number two.

  20. #739
    Pin Pal MDB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JoeyShabadooJr. View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by angeldeb82 View Post
    : Homer, would you please stop reading that Ross Perot pamphlet?

    In the latin american version, marge says "Mr. Burns pamphlet"
    Soon Season 31


  21. #740
    The Best Fan extra's Avatar
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  22. #741
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : Okay, sweetie, I got a story about another little girl who got lost in the woods, but it wasn't a girl, and it wasn't the woods.
    : [sucks her pacifier]
    : Suck suck indeed! And it all happened once upon a time, before you were born, and my chances for a man cave went out the window.

  23. #742
    Professional Teleporter Mícheál's Avatar
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    Homer: I'm gonna find Grandpa, save him, and tell him I can't wait until he dies!

  24. #743
    Always late to the party Whyyoubig's Avatar
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    AAH! Stupid sexy Flanders!
    Favorite/least favorite by season (not counting clip shows)
    Season 1: Life on the Fast Lane/Some Enchanted Evening Season 2: Bart the Daredevil/Old Money Season 3: Bart the Lover/Dog of Death Season 4: Last Exit to Springfield/Marge in Chains Season 5: Cape Feare/Bart Gets an Elephant Season 6: Homer the Great/Fear of Flying Season 7: Mother Simpson/Homerpalooza Season 8: You Only Move Twice/Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(D’oh)cious Season 9: The City of New York Vs Homer Simpson/Lisa the Skeptic Season 10: Lisa Gets an A/Homer Simpson in: Kidney Trouble Season 11: Behind the Laughter/It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge Season 12: Trilogy of Error/Homer Vs Dignity Season 13: I Am Furious (Yellow)/The Frying Game Season 14: Moe Baby Blues/Barting Over Season 15: Simple Simpson/Bart-Mangled Banner Season 16: Don’t Fear the Roofer/On a Clear Day I Can’t See My Sister Season 17: The Seemingly Never-Ending Story/Bonfire of the Manatees Season 18: 24 Minutes/The Boys of Bummer Season 19: Eternal Moonshine of the Simpson Mind/That 90’s Show Season 20: Gone Maggie Gone/In the Name of the Grandfather Season 21: The Bob Next Door/The Greatest Story Ever D’ohed Season 22: Angry Dad: The Movie/Elementary School Musical Season 23: Holidays of Future Passed/Lisa Goes Gaga Season 24: I haven’t seen this season Season 25: Brick Like Me/Days of Future Future Season 26: Simpsorama/The Musk Who Fell to Earth Season 27: Halloween of Horror/Every Man’s Dream Season 28: 22 For 30/Kamp Krustier Season 29: Gone Boy/The Old Blue Mayor She Ain’t What She Used to Be Season 30: TBD when 11 episodes have aired/TBD when 11 episodes have aired

  25. #744
    Professional Teleporter Mícheál's Avatar
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    Marge: Whatever happened to town pride?

    Lisa: It's been going downhill ever since the lake caught fire.

  26. #745
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Bob: Hello, Bart...'s friend.

  27. #746
    Professional Teleporter Mícheál's Avatar
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  28. #747
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : No, Bart! You have to stay with me!
    [meanwhile, in Bart's nightmare]
    : No, Dad! You have to stay with me!

  29. #748
    Pin Pal MDB's Avatar
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    -[At the outlet stores] Look at all these monstrosities.
    -Honey, what did I tell you about worshiping our corporate overlords?

  30. #749
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Somebody check the men's room for a Hugh Jass!

  31. #750
    Professional Teleporter Mícheál's Avatar
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    "I'm Hugh Jass"



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