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Thread: Let's just randomly post funny quotes



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  1. #601
    Newbie Thrillho777's Avatar
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    "Time to do what I do best: lie to a child" - Homer

  2. #602
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Mr. Burns:
    Some men hunt for sport,
    Others hunt for food;
    The only thing I'm hunting for
    Is an outfit that looks good...

    See my vest, see my vest,
    Made from real gorilla chest,
    Feel this sweater, there's no better
    Than authentic Irish setter.

    See this hat, 'twas my cat,
    My evening wear - vampire bat,
    These white slippers are albino
    African endangered rhino.

    Grizzly bear underwear,
    Turtles' necks, I've got my share,
    Beret of poodle, on my noodle
    It shall rest.

    Try my red robin suit,
    It comes one breast or two,
    See my vest, see my vest,
    See my vest.

    Like my loafers? Former gophers -
    It was that or skin my chauffeurs,
    But a greyhound fur tuxedo
    Would be best.

    So let's prepare these dogs...

    Nanny:
    Kill two for matching clogs.

    Mr. Burns:
    See my vest, see my vest,
    Oh please, won't you see my vest!


  3. #603
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : [sings] You flush one down, it swirls around. Nine hundred and ninety nine springs to flush down!
    : [knocks on door] You're not flushing those springs down our toilet, are you?
    : Of course not! [sings] Nine hundred and ninety six springs to flush down, nine hundred and ninety six springs!

  4. #604
    Junior Camper Mantis128's Avatar
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    "That's not how ya vwing!"

    "Oh a friendly bee."

    "I've got it! Lee Harvey Oswald wanted to steal the Jack Ruby!"

    "Beeees."

  5. #605
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    I can't make love till I've decided who to vote for!

  6. #606
    Stonecutter AlphaOmega's Avatar
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    Homer: "Hello, my name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me."

    Post Office Worker: "Ok Mr. Burns, uh, what's your first name?"

    Homer: "....I don't know."

  7. #607
    jammy dogder advisory board jim's Avatar
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    Major Quimby: errr uh

  8. #608
    Junior Camper
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    I've never gotten a promotion before.
    Once I thought I had, but it turned out to be a beautifully-worded firing

  9. #609
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Chief Wiggum: Fat Tony is a cancer upon Springfield! And I am the, uh, whatever cures cancer.

  10. #610
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Lisa:
    Don't cry for me, kids of Springfield.
    You can still reach me through e-mail,
    At smartgirl63_\[underscore, backslash]@yahoo.com!
    @yahoo.com!

  11. #611
    Ill-Mannered Sack of Crap LosTickaToeRest's Avatar
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    What's a truck?
    Earth. Atomizer. Let's go.

  12. #612
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    [after meeting Tony Blair] Wow, I can't believe we just met Mr. Bean!

  13. #613
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : We'll meet you in Central Park at 5:00.
    : Okay, but not a minute later. Once the sun goes down, all the weirdos turn crazy. (looks at person on street) I'm on to you!

  14. Thumbs Up To This Post by: Mantis128

  15. #614
    Ill-Mannered Sack of Crap LosTickaToeRest's Avatar
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    They were the Bonnie and Clyde of their day. Their names were Bonnie and Clyde.

  16. #615
    Pin Pal Corndog's Avatar
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    This is one of fav Homer moments. http://runt-of-the-web.com/wordpress...izza-place.jpg

  17. #616
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : It's so diverse! I've died and gone to a PBS kids' show!

  18. #617


    HOMER (singing): "Shaving my shoulders...i'm getting it all shaved off. "

  19. #618


    Clown College? You can't eat that.

  20. #619


    I can't remember the quote word for word, hopefully i get it mostly right.

    BART: "Sparkle, sparkle"
    HOMER: "Bart!"
    BARNEY: "Piiinnnhooole leaak"
    BART: "Dad, the earing could plug the hole"
    HOMER: "I'll plug your hole! I mean...Eureka!"

  21. #620


    ....It feels like i'm wearing nothing at all....Nothing at all...NOTHING AT ALL.
    STUPID SEXY FLANDERS!

  22. #621


    na na na na na na na na leader...na na na na na na na na leader... leader, leader...batman! i mean...leader! i love the leader!

  23. #622


    (HOMER looking at a picture of Bart) "Thats the guy! Thats the guy from my dream!"

  24. #623
    Junior Camper Mantis128's Avatar
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    "What about the tatoo on my you know what?"

    "Oh they have acids for that."

  25. #624
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    Priest: It’s almost midnight. They’ll be coming soon, Johnny. Coming to take you to the electric chair.
    Johnny Stabbo: I ain’t afraid of old sparky, the hot seat, the kilowatt couch, the death davenport, the electric lap, the crook cooker, the scorch stool!

  26. #625
    Ill-Mannered Sack of Crap LosTickaToeRest's Avatar
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    And that little boy who nobody liked grew up to be... Roy Cohn. And now you know the rest of the story.

  27. #626
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : No child of mine will go without anything. Ever. Except quality health care.

  28. #627
    Pin Pal Corndog's Avatar
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    In season 3 when Bart was saying his famous "At Caramba!" And his voice was Steve Allen. I don't know who he is. But the way he said it was one of my favorite moments in the whole show.

  29. #628
    SENDTHEMTOTHESLAUGHTERHOU SE!! BloodySimpsonChibi's Avatar
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    If I don't save the wee turtles, who will





    AHH! SAVE ME FROM THE WEE TURTLES! THEY WERE TOO QUICK FOR ME! AHHHH!
    Quote Originally Posted by Kaine View Post
    I'd imagine patting Lisa on the head would sting, damn kids with their spiky heads.


  30. #629
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : How was your day at work, dear?
    : Oh, the usual. Stand in front of this, open that, pull down this, bend over, spread apart that, turn your head that way, cough.

  31. #630
    Stonecutter angeldeb82's Avatar
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    : I'm afraid of nothing, not even hellfires. Just please, don't ever let me played by Mike Myers.



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