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Than Wyenn Memorial Productions

woody woodpecker (2017 film)

Rating: 2 votes, 5.00 average.
i am gonna watch woody woodpecker (2017 film)
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  1. The Goode Family's Avatar
    they said that this movie was only 84 minutes but my copy is 95!! wtf!!!
  2. The Goode Family's Avatar
    the movie opens with several shots of The Forest as we hear woody snoring and hes snorin the Loudest of all time. we see inside his tree hes asleep and hes havin a wet dream about peanut butter. Gross as fuk
  3. The Goode Family's Avatar
    we hear gunshots and woody faces the camera and goes UHOH BETTER CHECK IT OUT. how dare he erase the fourth wall like this. but then we cut to two poachers just strollin along and theres nothing. what a waste of ammo.
  4. The Goode Family's Avatar
    woody approaches the two nasty stereotypical redneck poachers and starts taunting them and they shoot at him although they have the slowest guns of all time just so woody can get his crappy Witticisms in as the bullets fly. why would poachers own such terrible guns. they probably arent good at gunnin down animals if the bullets are snaillike...
  5. The Goode Family's Avatar
    woody outsmarts them and they end up tranking each other. he then drills his name into a tree, which i know its the title card but what an egomaniac!
  6. The Goode Family's Avatar
    we cut to shots of seattle where we of course get the obligatory 10-second glamor shot of the space needle because it's seattle and that's very important i'm sure
  7. The Goode Family's Avatar
    timothy omundson is a lawyer who gets fired after a video of him going "WILDLIFE SUCKS AND OIL IS GOOD" is Discovered. because you know that's what people do, talk in Villainous soundbites like that. i wonder if he will turn out to be a nuisance to famed Wildlife Boi woody woodpecker...
  8. The Goode Family's Avatar
    omundson complains to his 30-something brazilian girlfriend played by thaila ayala. he says he plans to build a large home in the Woods and flip it for a large sum of money. then we cut to those Angry poachers from earlier who spit and snarl with southern accents about how much they wanna kill woody and oh joy two sets of antagonists ??? whatever it is woody woodpecker sucks so i hope omundson succeeds in building his home and the poachers succeed in murdering mr woodrow
  9. The Goode Family's Avatar
    we get a 1 second scene of woody goin HOME SWEET HOME AND NO ONE IS AROUND TO BE A BOTHER which is followed by a loud belch now thats comedy
  10. The Goode Family's Avatar
    we cut back to omundson packing to travel to the woods to build his house (they use a random shot of the space needle as an establishing shot which cracks me up guess they didnt have much stock seattle shit) when omundsons ex-wife arrives and talks about her Dyin Dad and how omundson has to watch their son for the next little while. we see omundson's son Omundsonson is the stereotypical movie teenager, always wearing hugeass headphones and listening to... faceless rock music? come on movie hes a Suburban White Boi he would obv be listening to hippity hop.
  11. The Goode Family's Avatar
    Omundsonson (who has the hilariously generic movie kid name of TOMMY) drops sick fire after omundson tells him to stfu with the music and stop drumming by slappin his hands on shit. TOMMY gets vry offended and tells omundson "i know u dont want me here, the only kid u wanna be around is ur girlfriend"
  12. The Goode Family's Avatar
    several glamor shots of Nature as omundson and co pull an RV into the Wilderness. wheres the space needle tho?? im freakin out!!
  13. The Goode Family's Avatar
    omundson says We Are Here and his gf says By Here Do U Mean Middle Of Nowhere??? uh what how are those two mutually exclusive. this snappy burn doesnt make a lick of sense.
  14. The Goode Family's Avatar
    omundson starts describing the home hes gonna build in the forest and TOMMY goes "awesome!!" and then it Halariously turns out hes talkin about his phone getting good reception or somethin. if this kid Yelps whenever he gets good reception he must be socked in the face a lot.
  15. The Goode Family's Avatar
    we cut to some park ranger goin around stapling NO POACHIN signs on trees but it lasts for like a second before we see omundson set up a grill and fail. turns out his son was recording and is posting it to Unnamed Movie Social Media with the hashtag #EpicDadGrillFail. ah, a true classic hashtag that the kids love. #liamneesonisthesameguyineverymovie
  16. The Goode Family's Avatar
    the park ranger from before appears and introduces herself as Sam Bartlett. bartlett tells omundson that if he sees any poachers he must report them. she also Slams the house model that omundson has built up because the finished house would be Sooo big and would overwhelm the beauty of the forest. omundson and his gf tell her to go fuck herself and she leaves. TOMMY however has a boner for her because i guess he likes the Wildlife and i wasnt payin attention
  17. The Goode Family's Avatar
    omundson demands tommy help him with the grill but tommy instead chooses to go for a stroll in the woods. he sits down at a picnic table and starts blaring his Rock Music and slappin the table along to it and im pissed. then woody comes out of nowhere and starts slammin on a trash can and now i just wanna die.
  18. The Goode Family's Avatar
    after that Great Scene we cut to omundson and co eating dinner and woody appears. omundson and his gf Freek Out while woody yaks for a million hours with his hysterical jokes. he eats beans and farts a lot LOL!!!
  19. The Goode Family's Avatar
    omundson grabs a broom to try and hit woody and ends up slamming his girlfriend in the face. hilarious!
  20. The Goode Family's Avatar
    now its night time and we see omundson struggle to sleep because woody outside is pecking a tree like crazy for some reason. what an anus woody is!! omundson goes outside and throws his shoe at woody who somehow catches it and throws it slowly back at him and it somehow beans him in the face. this movies transition to become Furry Vengeance Lite is complete!
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