/watch?v=J7Q3z39RS4g

it starts with twins discussing being twins

i'm pretty sure these are all played by the same actors/actresses too

opening credits are a montage of clips of jack+jill as children through the years set to "I Got You Babe"

jill farts in a bathtub for a good ten seconds during this

regis philbin is starring in a pepto bismol commercial as this starts, presumably to subtly remind the viewers how to fix the stomach troubles this movie causes

there is a fuckin cart of pepto bismols aimed right at the camera in this scene for zero reason. outside of the commercial's shot

"tell jill that she...has nice shoes" good advice Wife

cut to a sleeping mexican in an empty airport to introduce Jill at the airport

note to the unfamiliar: these are both played by adam sandler

Jill has a bird played by adam sandler

disappointingly the car is not played by adam sandler

Jill (adam sandler) gives literally the worst performance i have seen in a major movie while trying to get Jack (adam sandler) in bed with her

Jack (adam sandler)'s child got a green belt and Jill (adam sandler) is shocked and offended she was not told as if this is life-changing news

Jack (adam sandler)'s other child is taping a turkey to his chest

nobody points it out so i'm left to assume this is a thing he does regularly

Jack (adam sandler) and Jill (adam sandler) are two adults that share a secret language

i could be wrong, but i'm pretty sure Jill just called a man al qaeda because he looked homeless

Al Pacino has a nervous breakdown in a theatre show because people didn't shut off their phones

he barely even yells and we're supposed to treat this like it's the end of his career

"Jay Leno better watch his back!" - Jack after his gardener does an impression of a tree and yells "I'm kiiiidding I'm kiiidding"

Jill made a horse collapse because she weighs too much

the other kid bikes around with a hamster taped to his back

this movie is really bad you guys

OOP we're on price is right now why the hell not

Jill knocks herself out trying to spin the wheel

meanwhile Jack is at home watching the masterpiece that is Scarface

Jill somehow manages to fly a jetski into a tree out of Jack's pool

the cg is about as bad as you'd expect

this scene means nothing and is not funny in any way

Jack and Jill both fart in a movie theatre marking fart joke #2 of the movie

much less than i was expecting