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Thread: Lines/Jokes/Gags that still crack you up?



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  1. #31
    muffin tops Prune Tracy's Avatar
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    That's it! Back to Winnipeg!


  2. #32


    Aw man I forgot about that one. Thanks for the laugh, Riviera.

    It sucks they cut that scene from the reruns.

  3. #33
    I'ma crash into you!!! Handsome B. Wonderful's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shave Those Sideburns! View Post
    Aw man I forgot about that one. Thanks for the laugh, Riviera.

    It sucks they cut that scene from the reruns.
    Who cares? That's what DVD is for.
    Quote Originally Posted by Teddy View Post
    I was searching Burns and Smithers in July of 2012 and found this site in the results. At first, NHC was blocked on my laptop (for reasons I shall not say) so I used my Dad's laptop to look at it. For a whole month, I just searched R&R and Mr. Burns and Smithers threads. Then I decided to sign up.

  4. #34


    From Selma's Choice:

    Lisa: "I am the Lizard Queen!"

    And this:

    Selma: Thanks, Doctor.

    Doctor: Oh, i'm not a doctor.

    "Homer: I've always wondered if there was a god. And now I know there is. And it's me."
    - Homer the Great

    "Bart: Lis, today I am a god.
    Lisa: Is that why you're sitting on an ice cream sandwich?
    Bart: Eww!"
    - Bart's Inner Child

  5. #35
    He was a zombie? Christopher the Chef's Avatar
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    Oh be nice!

  6. #36


    The Canine Mutiny: The dead parrot scene.
    Viva Ned Flanders: The anal probing jokes.

    And finally my all time favorite...
    Moe's interrogation scene in Who Shot Mr Burns Part 2.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-TZ8Z5S9rI
    Blasphemy is a victimless crime.

  7. #37


    "You're Daryl Strawberry?"

    "Yes"

    "You play right field?

    "Yes"

    "I play right field too"

    "So?"

    "Well are you better than me?

    "Well I've never met you but...yeeeeees"

  8. #38
    Mapple Fan-boy HMS pinafore's Avatar
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    I have to go now. My planet needs me



  9. #39
    Take it! Sonic's Avatar
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    Hey, children! Meet me... Sideshow... Cecil!


  10. #40
    SEASON 25?!? Wavy Gravy's Avatar
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    "Kids! We're good parents now! Get your asses out here!"
    Quote Originally Posted by Citizen Snips
    Fuck typos Im drunhk.
    My DeviantArt.


  11. #41


    Quote Originally Posted by Wavy Gravy View Post
    "Kids! We're good parents now! Get your asses out here!"
    There are a lot of little tricks to it, things you should have learned a long time ago. Such as, if you leave milk out, it can go sour. Put it in the refrigerator, or, failing that, a cool wet sack.
    And put your garbage in a garbage can, people. I can't stress that enough. Don't just throw it out the window.

    "Garbage in garbage can"...hmm, makes sense.

  12. #42


    Homer reading Flanders letter to the rest of the family is HILARIOUS!

    "A deep pain...deep in my bosom" *whole family laugh except for Marge*

    "How dare you, that man opens up his heart and you just laugh at him!"

    *Marge then secretly chuckles*

  13. #43
    Mapple Fan-boy HMS pinafore's Avatar
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    "This just in...the Lincoln Squirrel has been assassinated! Well stay with this all night if we have to..."

  14. #44
    Is it wrong to fancy Marge? PJ.'s Avatar
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    Seeing Ralph in the line for being slaughtered in the advert for the competition to win something in packs of bacon. Gets me every time I see it.
    I founded the company of public toilets that you can read an online encyclopedia whilst you are there but had to abort the project as all the domain names for Wikileaks had been taken ;-)

  15. #45
    board statistician™ ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬'s Avatar
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    - $5!
    - $500
    - $5 cash!
    -The promise of cash is not an incentive
    -$501!!
    -$10 million
    -objection your honor!
    -this is not a court room, but overruled
    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd Groupie View Post
    If a dude tried to cum on my face I would remove his testicles.

  16. #46


    The Nuclear Power Plant commercial;

    Homer: Yes. It's the career of tomorrow...today! So it's settled. We'll all pursue our great opportunities in the field of . . . LINE?
    Mr. Burns: (in an angry whisper) Nuclear power!!!
    Homer (in same angry whisper): Nuclear power!!!
    Mr. Burns (bursting onto the set): You blithering flock of dunderheads are the worst--[End of commercial]

  17. #47
    Formally Fry-O-Rama Homer Defined's Avatar
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    From Marge Be Not Proud at the end credits

    "You have selected POWERDRIVE!"

    "The ball is in the parking lot, would you like to play again?

    -You have selected...NO.

    And the line from Homer in the same episode

    Homer: (Laughs) Get em' Ma!
    Jimbo Jones: [about Homer] I hear that guy's ass has it's own congressman!
    Bart Simpson: I wash myself with a rag on a stick.
    Homer Simpson: [takes cap out of dryer and puts it on his head] Mmmmm... I CAN feel three types of softness.
    Lisa Simpson: [from upstairs] Dad, what are you doing down there?
    Homer Simpson: Washing my fat guy's hat honey!



  18. #48
    SEASON 25?!? Wavy Gravy's Avatar
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    "Donuts, I got donuts, I -- hey, I know you!"

  19. #49
    hidle-onar-takan-thran Toomanygrandmas's Avatar
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    Whenever Homer puts on his 'woman' voice. Gets me every time.



    'I love you, Homie. Mmm...

    Heh heh, I don't need her at all any more.'

    On the same subject, see Homer trying to pass himself off as Mr. Burns' mother in 'Homer the Smithers'.
    Poochie needs to be louder, angrier, and have access to a time machine

  20. #50
    I'ma crash into you!!! Handsome B. Wonderful's Avatar
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    My name is Luka, I liiiiiiiiiive on the second flooooooooor.

  21. #51
    SEASON 25?!? Wavy Gravy's Avatar
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    "What the hell is this, some kind of tube?"

  22. #52




    "oh no! your room is full of toys. you're going to the er, garage!"

  23. #53
    Work! Consume! Die! Shaunbadia's Avatar
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    Grampa: "That doll is evil I tells ya! EVIL! EEEEEEEEEEEVIIIIIIL!"
    Marge: "Grampa you said that abut all the presents."
    Grampa: "I just want attention."

    Moe: "Aw, so you're lookin' for a Mr. Smithers, first name WAYLON IS IT!? Listen to me you! When I catch you I'm gonna pull your eyes outta their sockets and shove down your pants so you can watch me kick the crap ouuta you, OKAY!? And then I'm gonna use your tongue to pain my boat!"

    Also, "THAT'S IT BACK TO WINNIPEG!", "On closer inspection, these are loafers" and the ol' Wiggum charm.

    Just be thankful

  24. #54
    I beg celebrities for money! iambobdole1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shaunbadia View Post
    it sucked fucking shit bananas.

  25. #55
    Sure we will Mr. Homer ANdre1001's Avatar
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    From "Home Sweet Home-Diddily-Dum-Doodily" (Man! Long episode name)

    Marge: Where are we going? Where are we going?
    Homer: OK, OK, don't panic. To find Flanders, I just have to think like
    Flanders!
    [thinking] I'm a big four-eyed lame-o, and I wear the same
    stupid sweater every day and --
    [aloud] The Springfield River!


  26. #56
    Junior Camper harlequinade's Avatar
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    "Can I borrow a feeling? BAHAHA and your picture's on the box!"
    "I sleep in a race car bed, where do you sleep?" "I sleep in a big bed with my wife."

    Martin's birthday gift to Bart in Radio Bart: "Now we can be twins!"
    "We're sending our love down the well!"

    "Instead of going to the box factory today, we'll be going to.... the box factory!"

  27. #57


    Martin: [skipping around Nelson and singing]
    Hark to the tale of Nelson,
    and the boy he loved so dear.
    [Nelson takes a swipe at him but misses]
    They remained the best of friends
    For years and years and years.

  28. #58
    You Broke Nothing! Mr Black's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Company Picnic
    almost sexual


  29. #59
    Sure we will Mr. Homer ANdre1001's Avatar
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    My favorite daydreaming of the whole series!!!! XD



    Bart: Hey, Lis, you still upset about that jazz guy?
    Lisa: [noticing Bart] Oh.
    Bart: If it helps, I believe that after you die, you come back as
    whatever you want. I'll be a butterfly.
    Lisa: How come?
    Bart: Because, nobody _ever_ suspects the butterfly. [laughs]


  30. #60


    Quote Originally Posted by Spiff View Post
    That's Handsome Pete. He dances for nickels.
    Not this but at the end of the scene

    "Not a quarter. Arr, he'll be dancin' for hours."

    Also from the Cartridge Family,

    I'd kill you if I had my gun!
    Yeah well you don't.

    A few others,











    Sorry love to watch them


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