Alas my ship, whom I love like a woman, is... disabled

[Shaunbadia]

Bender: "You shot me! You miserable dingus!"

[Oh, that's raspberry!]

"You can crush me but you can't crush my spirit."
*is crushed
"Ahhh! My spirit!"

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

This isn't really a quote, but one I'd like to see. It's a halloween special and they put up decorations, a thug runs off with one of the decorations, and La Barbera screams, "MY MAN'S WITCH!"

[Shaunbadia]

Leela: "We've done nothing wrong! Other than killing and dismembering the vice president..."

[Lionheart]

This isn't really a quote, but one I'd like to see. It's a halloween special and they put up decorations, a thug runs off with one of the decorations, and La Barbera screams, "MY MAN'S WITCH!"

It's Manwich, which is basically just a sloppy joe sauce.

Anyways

Leela: They buried your brother in the world hero section? I'm impressed.
Fry: I should be the one in that grave!

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

It's Manwich, which is basically just a sloppy joe sauce.

I...know?

[irvine_11]

Ah, finally I have a good claw! 3 human females, a number, and a king giving himself brain surgery!

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

Compare your lives to mine and then kill yourselves!

[Malaise Forever]

"I agreed to something I didn't read!
-I slightly modified something I own!
We're monsters!"

One of my new favorite quotes

[Spiff]

"Looky there. It's one of them things like on our mudflaps."
"Yosemite Sam?"

[Flimpson Tide]

"That doesn't look like an L at all! ...Unless you count lower case..."
"You know we don't!"

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

Today, some bad things happened. One bad thing was, a train got crashed in New Jersey, wanna see? People won't be late for work though, the governor lady said, "I'm sending more trains!"

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

You want a torah?

Naah, I'm not hungry.

[Paul]

"There's a dam!"
"Damn!"
"There's a grate!"
"Great!"

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

Oh my, that steamed carrot was a bit spicy for me!

[CousinMerl]

"Jail's not so bad. You can make sangria in the terlet. Course, it's shank or be shanked."

[cloneasaurus]

Please, you give me too little credit!

[Paul]

"Up yours, Zoidberg! Up wherever your species traditionally crams things!"

[ManiacalRoboKiller]

Bender: "Wait, I've got it. Professor, make a woman out of me!"
Professor: "Oh I think we should just stay friends"

Fry: So you have to choose between life without sex and a hideous, gruesome death?
Dr. Zoidberg: Yes.
Fry: Tough call.

Professor Hubert Farnsworth: So many loves half-loved. So many inventions half-invented. That damn time machine alone set me back fifteen years.
Dr. Zoidberg: If only it'd work, you could go back and not waste your time on it.

Cubert J. Farnsworth: As long as I'm going to be in charge here, let me examine my so-called crew, if it can so be called. First of all, "Doctor" Zoidberg, do you even have a medical degree?
Dr. Zoidberg: I lost it... in a volcano.

Dr. Zoidberg: Courage. Not enough of it. Need some from what's-his-name.

Hermes Conrad: Are you back to your original age, professor?
Professor Hubert Farnsworth: Even older. Huzzah!

Turanga Leela: She can't hear us in here, so just pretend to shower.
Philip J. Fry: Same as everyday. Got it.

Professor Hubert Farnsworth: Now, now, perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything.

Fry: Professor, when did you become so obsessed with voting?
Professor Hubert Farnsworth: The very instant I became old.

Police Recruiter: You think you can just waltz in here with no pants and become a cop?
Philip J. Fry: That's the plan.
Police Recruiter: I like you, kid. I got no pants on either.

Leela: Hey, what's behind that door?
Glurmo: Nothing!
Leela: Is it the secret ingredient?
Grunka Lunkas: Grunka Lunka Dunkity Dingredient, you should not ask about the secret ingredient.
Bender: Ok, ok. We get the point.
Leela: I was just curious because of the armed guards.
Grunka Lunkas: Grunka Lunka Dunkity Darmed Guards...
Bender: Shut the hell up!

[Spiff]

"That probulator sure knows how to please a man."

[Oh, that's raspberry!]

This has to have been said already, but:

"Enough about your promiscuous mother Hermes!"

[Paul]

"We did all we could."
"You mean he's--"
"Good as new? Yes!"

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

Why isn't Leela back yet? You think she's okay?

How should I know? And how come you never ask if I'm okay? I'm feelin' a little neglected here.

Oh, sorry. Are you okay Bender?

Shut up.

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

There's no such thing as space aliens!

Oh? How can you be so sure them aliens aren't already among us?

Because you ARE ONE!

[Gran2]

"Oh, don't worry, Fry. I too once spent a nightmare-ish time in a robot asylum. But now it's nearly over. So long."

[Asha]

It's just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. Then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns and also he got a racecar. Is any of this getting through to you?

[Swoony]

Damn. I just used a quote that someone else already used.

New quote:

Lucy Lubot: "Oh Fry, I love you more than the moon, and the stars, and the POETIC IMAGE NUMBER 137 NOT FOUND"

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

I'll always remember you, Fry MEMORY DELETED

[Pops]

"Oh blithery poop my cowardly lobster!"

[Oh, that's raspberry!]

Now let's see who's been naughty...and who's been naughty!