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Thread: Alas my ship, whom I love like a woman, is... disabled



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  1. 05-31-2011, 07:39 PM #181
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    Look at Walter Koenig... after Star Trek, he became an actor!
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  2. 06-03-2011, 10:04 PM #182
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    Woo! I got fruit boobs!
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  3. 06-05-2011, 09:49 PM #183
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brodie View Post
    Look at Walter Koenig... after Star Trek, he became an actor!
    Not just an actor, but a well-rounded person! With my own friends and credit cards and keys...
    Two eyes, two ears, a chin, a mouth, ten fingers, two nipples, a butt, two kneecaps, a penis. I've just described to you the Loch Ness Monster. And the reward for its capture? All the riches in Scotland. So I have one question: why are you here?
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  4. 06-06-2011, 02:26 AM #184
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    "Good way to avoid frostbite, folks: Put your hands between your buttocks. That's nature's pocket."
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  5. 06-08-2011, 08:59 PM #185
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    Oh this is the happiest moment of my life! You all brought such wonderful gifts! But the greatest gift is the bond I share with my smizmar Amy. And soon, the quivering mass of life within me will depend on us both. Even now I can sense it feeding, squirming, searching, questing and shortly, it will rend my loins in twain, burst forth and pull us down, down, down into the deep dark waters of commitment.
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  6. 06-08-2011, 09:04 PM #186
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    Wow! Check out that guy! He makes Speedy Gonzalez look like regular Gonzalez!
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  7. 06-11-2011, 03:18 AM #187
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    Quote Originally Posted by NumberZone View Post
    "Good way to avoid frostbite, folks: Put your hands between your buttocks. That's nature's pocket."
    Leela: "I think I'll go check on Bender."
    Free Waterfall Senior: "Watch that he doesn't pick your pocket!"
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  8. 06-11-2011, 07:40 PM #188
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    KEN
    For a thousand years, the evil brains
    have been constructing the giant Infosphere,
    a giant memory bank twice the size of
    three ordinary memory banks.


    FRY
    What's so evil about that?


    FIONA
    They plan to collect all the information
    in the universe and store it in the
    sphere.


    FRY
    So they're trying to learn things?



    FIONA
    Right.


    FRY
    Those bastards!


    NIBBLER
    Being brains, they feel compelled to
    know everything. And soon they will.



    FRY
    I'm as mad as I've ever been.


    KEN
    Once their task is complete, they will
    ensure no new information arises in
    the only way possible: by destroying
    the universe.


    FRY
    Now it's personal.
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  9. 06-20-2011, 04:52 PM #189
    hughes
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    "And that's why the third graders at PS139 are Morbo's Vermin Of The Week."
    Living In a Rock and Roll Fantasy--my music review blog
    Most recent review--The Who's My Generation (12/15)
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  10. 06-21-2011, 05:17 AM #190
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    We will raise your planet's temperature by one million degrees a day, for five days, unless we see McNeal at 9pm tomorrow (8 central)!
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  11. 06-21-2011, 03:31 PM #191
    DotheBartman
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    Heroes don't do drugs. Except for Drugman, I guess.
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  12. 06-21-2011, 10:37 PM #192
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    It was almost the perfect crime, but you forgot one thing: rock crushes scissors. But paper covers rock...and scissors cut paper. Kif, we have a conundrum. Search them for paper! And bring me a rock.
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  13. 06-23-2011, 02:08 AM #193
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    Extra! Extra! Greatest opera of all time sucks!
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  14. 06-23-2011, 09:44 PM #194
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    THANK YOU BOB BARKER, I'M AS HAPPY AS A GIRL CAN BE END STATEMENT
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  15. 06-26-2011, 06:49 AM #195
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    Now, the first order of business is lunch. I suggest a nice lobster Zoidberg. I mean, err... lobster Newberg. I mean... Doctor Zoidberg
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  16. 06-27-2011, 04:29 AM #196
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    "With all due respect, Donbot, I don't think we should rely on an accident happening. Let's kill him ourselves."
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  17. 06-28-2011, 06:46 PM #197
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    THIS ONE'S LIKE A SUMMER GUY!
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  18. 06-28-2011, 10:06 PM #198
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    As the candy hearts poured into the fiery quasar, a wondrous thing happened, why not. They vaporized into a mystical love radiation that spread across the universe, destroying many, many planets. Including two gangster planets, and a cowboy world!

    But one planet was exactly the right distance to see the romantic rays, but not be destroyed by them: Earth. So all over the world, couples stood together in joy. And me, Zoidberg! And no one could have been happier, unless it would have also been Valentine's Day.

    What? It was? Hooray!
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  19. 06-29-2011, 04:14 PM #199
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    a greater tragedy i have never beheld... well into the terlet
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  20. 07-01-2011, 02:15 AM #200
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    ROBOPUPPY PREPARING TO LICK CHEEK!
    ROBOPUPPY COMMENCING CHEEK LICKING!
    LICKING IN PROGRESS!
    LICKING COMPLETE!

    ROBOPUPPY COMMENCING TWO-HOUR YIPPING SESSION!
    YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP
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  21. 07-03-2011, 12:36 PM #201
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    Brannigan's Law is like Brannigan's love: hard and fast
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  22. 07-03-2011, 11:33 PM #202
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    Your latest performance was as delectable as dipping my bottom over and over into a bath of the silkiest oils and creams
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  23. 07-04-2011, 06:34 AM #203
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brodie View Post
    Your latest performance was as delectable as dipping my bottom over and over into a bath of the silkiest oils and creams
    Thank you sir, that's exactly what I was going for.
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  24. 07-04-2011, 06:39 AM #204
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    Bah! This opera's as lousy as it is brilliant! Your lyrics lack subtlety. You can't just have the characters announce how they feel! That makes me feel angry.
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  25. 07-08-2011, 10:58 PM #205
    DotheBartman
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    I knew something was wrong, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Then it hit me: you showed Bender sharing the deadly booze with our friends. Bender would never share!

    The very idea!
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  26. 07-09-2011, 03:02 AM #206
    Comicshow MolemanBob
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    “Fry, due to the unfortunate loss of Officer Smith, you’ll be riding with URL.” – Captain
    “And Smitty was just a few days from retirement.” – URL
    “Wh-what happened?” – Fry
    “He took an early retirement. Damn.” – URL
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  27. 07-09-2011, 03:10 AM #207
    DotheBartman
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    It's wrong, Wash Bucket. Oh, it would be sweet for a while, but in the back of our minds we'd know that I'm a man and you're janitorial equipment.
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  28. 07-09-2011, 08:19 AM #208
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    We're owl exterminators!
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  29. 07-09-2011, 12:35 PM #209
    Spiff
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    And yet she's cursed to live the horrible degrading life of a mutant. Like all of us. Especially him!
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  30. 07-11-2011, 12:20 AM #210
    DotheBartman
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    Mr. Mayor, if you want to see a real vampire, look in the mirror!

    I can't! I'm a vampire!
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