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Thread: Alas my ship, whom I love like a woman, is... disabled



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  1. 02-23-2011, 01:16 PM #121
    Asha
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    Bender: Don't worry guys, I'll never be too good or too evil again. From
    now on, I'll just be me.
    Leela: Uh, do you think you could be just little less evil than that?
    "If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?"
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  2. 02-23-2011, 02:24 PM #122
    Asha
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    "I hate the people who love me, and they hate me"
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  3. 02-23-2011, 02:27 PM #123
    DotheBartman
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    This is ancient Earth's most foolish program. Why does Ross, the largest friend, not simply eat the other five?
    Two eyes, two ears, a chin, a mouth, ten fingers, two nipples, a butt, two kneecaps, a penis. I've just described to you the Loch Ness Monster. And the reward for its capture? All the riches in Scotland. So I have one question: why are you here?
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  4. 02-23-2011, 05:43 PM #124
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    Dearest, meet Bender. He's a robot in the body of a Chinese Martian physicist.

    How tedious
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  5. 02-25-2011, 03:46 PM #125
    Asha
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    "Of all the friends I've had... You're the first"
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  6. 02-27-2011, 08:09 PM #126
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    Thank you, thank you so much. You know through all my ups and downs, I always thought the most important thing in life was to win an Oscar. But tonight I realized what's really important is to win two Oscars!
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  7. 03-03-2011, 01:33 AM #127
    CousinMerl
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    I'm beginning to think there'll be no forced mating at all.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ryan View Post
    what a fucking weird choice for a thread, doesn't seem like something that would apply to a lot of people.
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  8. 03-03-2011, 09:57 AM #128
    Asha
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    Professor: Now that you’re our new employees, I’d like you to have a look at our commercial. I paid to have it aired during the Super Bowl.
    Fry: Wow
    Professor: Not on the same channel, of course…
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  9. 03-07-2011, 02:55 PM #129
    Spiff
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    Ah, Wade Boggs, goes down smooth.
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  10. 03-12-2011, 05:26 PM #130
    L. Hutz
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    "If robosexual marriage is legalized imagine all of the bad things that will happen, then imagine we said those things... because we couldn't think of any."
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  11. 03-12-2011, 05:57 PM #131
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    Say, speaking of whatever the hell you just said, I need to make a cell phone telephone call. Can I borrow your cell phone telephone?
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  12. 03-12-2011, 06:37 PM #132
    Gorky
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    People are trying to have emotions!
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  13. 03-12-2011, 07:38 PM #133
    L. Hutz
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    Leela:"Did you really think you would need all of this stuff in the afterlife?"
    Bender:"Please, if I really thought I had to live a whole other life after this one I'd kill myself right now."
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  14. 03-13-2011, 01:04 AM #134
    DotheBartman
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    Thank you. That song doesn't usually last three hours, but we got into a serious thing. And then I forgot how it ended.
    Last edited by DotheBartman; 03-13-2011 at 01:19 AM.
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  15. 03-13-2011, 05:35 AM #135
    Gorky
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    You're with me now. This is the maximum level of being with me!
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  16. 03-13-2011, 12:35 PM #136
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    What fevered dream is this that bids to tear this company in twain?
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  17. 03-15-2011, 07:09 PM #137
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    Monday Monkey lives for the weekend, sir
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  18. 03-23-2011, 04:00 AM #138
    Asha
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    "Oh. Your. God."
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  19. 03-23-2011, 05:27 PM #139
    hughes
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    Hermes: Scram you lousy green snakes! Here Leela, take this and use it to shoot those guys.
    Leela: Right! If they try to look in the box.
    Hermes: Whatever
    Living In a Rock and Roll Fantasy--my music review blog
    Most recent review--The Who's My Generation (12/15)
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  20. 03-23-2011, 05:31 PM #140
    Neptune
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    "Jesus, please help us!"
    "I only help those who help themselves!"
    "I'll die before I surrender,Tim."
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  21. 03-24-2011, 12:54 AM #141
    Asha
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    "I'll find Fry's coffin, get his corpse, and keep it under my mattress to remind me that he's really dead. That'll prove I'm not insane!"
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  22. 03-26-2011, 01:28 AM #142
    DotheBartman
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    Hooray, a happy ending for the rich people!
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  23. 04-05-2011, 05:13 AM #143
    Asha
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    Fry: This is awesome! Are we gonna fly through space fighting monsters and teaching alien women to love?
    Professor Farnsworth: If by that you mean transporting cargo, then yes!
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  24. 04-05-2011, 05:30 AM #144
    Adam R
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    why'd you open your bonghole, you smelly hippie? you'd sacrifice a beautiful woman to save this moderately attractive monkey? you must have smoked some bad granola.
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  25. 04-05-2011, 10:00 PM #145
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    Leela: Now, bees communicate by dancing

    Fry: Like my parents! Oh wait, that was hitting.
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  26. 04-06-2011, 12:14 PM #146
    Dr. Fishopolis
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    YOUR GRANNY CAN GO TO HELL!!!
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  27. 04-06-2011, 03:04 PM #147
    hughes
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    Stop exploding, you cowards!
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  28. 04-06-2011, 06:12 PM #148
    HRH Sir Prince Charles
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    We thought you only cared about cans of anchovies and stuffy old songs about buttocks
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  29. 04-06-2011, 06:34 PM #149
    pecken
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    i can wire anything directly into anything! i'm the professor!
    Quote Originally Posted by Poison View Post
    i was going though deleted scenes when i saw the lead singer of the who saying shut the fuck up marge
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  30. 04-07-2011, 11:44 AM #150
    Dr. Fishopolis
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    What's the matter, private? Tent got your tongue? Hehe, tent got your tongue. Kiff, write that down and send it to "Humor in Uniform".
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