Advanced Learning Lisa - The NHC Script

[Adam R]

The following post is out of date. I am no longer running this project and a new show runner is yet to be decided, so I have been given no word on what else to include here, but the majority of the information is correct. Thanks, Adam R

Welcome to the main thread for the NHC script, a group project that I am head of.

Over the next, um, whenever, we will be working as a team to write our own script. At the moment, you can sign up in this thread. Currently, this is the list of staff that signed up for the script:

Members active in chats discussing the script
Adam R
Captain Edwell
Homer_Thompson
Jimmy C
Kiyosuki
moneychair2003
Robert Benchley
Stratman
User 1.0

Active board members that have occasionally contributed
Ivan P
MattG_Fan
Nameless
Xt'Tapalatakettle

Members who are either inactive or have yet to contribute to the project
Garret
Lady_Simpson
Sniper Squirrel
StrideR
TheForbiddenDonut

New staff
...Damned if you do
banana plantation
Burninmaphone
Chief Simpson
Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo
Reservoir Dog
schwarzenegro

The title of the script is Advanced Learning Lisa, pitched by MattG_Fan. Here is his original pitch:

Lisa is very excited, when after two weeks of redoing a unit in her class because the other students all failed, they are finally moving on to a new study. However, when Lisa comes into to school that day, she is very dismade to find the class has to go over the unit a third time. That is until, a frustrated new third grade teacher(Chuck Gerston) comes along, and creates an afterschool studies group for Lisa and other students who aren't being challenged. Lisa develops a rapport with the teacher, but things begin to get bad when parents start complaining that their kid isn't in the advanced studies group. Meanwhile, Homer, after playing a game of clue with the family, becomes obsessed with mysteries, and mystery solving. He goes around trying to solves mysteries wherever he can. But the biggest mystery for him to solve comes when Chuck Gerston goes missing, and Lisa hires her dad to solve the mystery of where he has gone.

So far, we have this much of the episode planned out as we want it:

The episode opens with the family sitting around a table eating breakfast. Lisa is very excited that her class is moving on to a unit about Columbus after having to repeat a topic on Ancient Egypt because the rest of the class failed it. When Lisa arrives in class, Miss Hoover tells her that the other students failed it again and they have to repeat the topic for a third time. Later on, Lisa is outside venting her frustration and she overhears a teacher who is equally frustrated (Chuck Gerston) teaching a class of older children who aren't willing to learn at all (although maybe some able pupils should be included in the class, otherwise it'll be hard to show what Lisa likes about him). She enjoys his teaching methods and thinks that his guidance could get the best out of her. After that lesson has finished, she approaches him and says that she wants to be taught by him. Because Gerston is quite arrogant and thinks that his teaching methods are being wasted currently, he sees this as the perfect opportunity to teach willing students and sets up an after school class for students like Lisa. This will take up the bulk of act one.

Act two will see the classes begin and Lisa enjoys the lessons a lot, although his lessons feature undertones of teaching the students that they are better than the less intelligent, much like he is. Lisa notice this and questions it at one point or another. However, the parents of several students begin to complain that their student isn't being taught in the advanced group. The act ends with Lisa going to the class to find that Gerston has disappeared. Lisa goes to the police, but Wiggum refuses to look for Gerston because Ralph wasn't being taught in the advanced studies group. Now, as we weren't really sure how Homer's detective thing would fit in, it has been dropped for now, but there is a possibility that he has been supporting and listening to Lisa throughout acts one and two and when Gerston goes missing, he wants to help her find him (similar to his role in Lisa the Iconoclast). When they finally do find Gerston, it turns out that he ran away because of the pressure he was under. He leaves Lisa with the words to eventually do her best to get out of there to try and make something of herself. Lisa tells him off, thinking for herself, rather than blindly following him.

All aspects of the script are discussed in this thread, but there is a chat room for the script located here (members must use their board name as the screen name). At the moment, the group meet weekly at the following times on Saturdays (US)/Sundays (UK and Aus):

Sydney: 9am
Perth: 7am
London: 12am
NYC: 7pm

We don't really have a deadline, our progress has been pretty slow. :silly: I'll try and update this post for anything big whenever I remember. Get writing!

[Stratman]

I'm not entirely sure if I'm allowed to contribute at this point, but...

I feel Lisa's relationship with Mr. Gerston should be one of love and hate. He should challenge her, a kind of tough love situation.

I was channel surfing a few weeks ago and happened upon a movie called True Grit. Here's what Imdb has to say...

A drunken, hard-nosed U.S. Marshal and a Texas Ranger help a stubborn young woman track down her father's murderer in Indian territory.

I didn't watch it, I only saw a few minutes, but it feels like something we could, possibly, allude to in the script. Perhaps...

[User 1.0]

I feel Lisa's relationship with Mr. Gerston should be one of love and hate. He should challenge her, a kind of tough love situation.

I like this idea because so far, he seems too much like Mr. Bergstrom and we should try to create an interesting new situation and relationship for Lisa.

Another idea for the Gerston character is that he's sort of a lonely and depressed loser in his personal life and this is why teaching and the future of students like Lisa is so important to him.

[Nebuchanezzar]

It may be interesting to have a student in the advanced learning class who Lisa becomes good friends with too. Much like Alison, but without the competitive edge so that this certain plot doesn't feel rehashed. Then we could have a trio, and whilst it doesn't allow for as much one on one, it still allows for this rapport with the teacher, and the rest of the plot to progress along quite well.

I think an important point to incorparate into this story, is a sort of change in dialogue on behalf of Lisa when she's with her little learning buddies. In the same way that she changed her dialogue with friends in Summer of 4 ft. 2, it's grossly unrealistic to assume that she'd continue speaking in the current fashion. She'd definately speak in a much more complex way, different tone etc...

The biggest question, is what happens to this teacher? Why does he go missing? I've given it a little thought, and the best bet is to have it heavily related to the dismayed parents of other kids, although I'm pretty sure everyone else already felt that way. Why did this teacher go missing on behalf of these parents? No idea, but I don't think it's wise for this plot to degenerate into crappy, mystery of the week dribble...personally.

[Stratman]

The biggest question, is what happens to this teacher? Why does he go missing? I've given it a little thought, and the best bet is to have it heavily related to the dismayed parents of other kids, although I'm pretty sure everyone else already felt that way. Why did this teacher go missing on behalf of these parents?

Perhaps one of the parents works for a credit company the teacher defrauded to fund a failed invention... something academic and smart, anyway.

[User 1.0]

No, the actual answer I had in mind for the mystery is that he ran off because he couldn't teach under those conditions, but he felt too disgraced leaving the students, so he decided to just dissapear.

I think that's the best solution, too.

BUT, I think that Homer should either discover sth. else during his investigations that has nothing to do with what he wanted to find out or think he's about to discover a big conspiracy but it turns out to be misunderstandings. I prefer the latter, because it could be pretty funny and it would give Homer a reason to give up his detective job/hobby.

[Stratman]

Surely there would have to be more to the solution than he simply couldn't teach under sub-par conditions?

[Nebuchanezzar]

On one hand, the sub-par thing offers a chance for some brief commentary and/or satire at the end, but it could seem cheap. On the other hand, we don't have any other ideas for it and it'd be hard to come up with something better. I tend to think that the current idea is pretty good, as it gives us a chance to commentate on public schooling. Just my thoughts on the matter.

Also, I imagine that the best way to write this is plot first, then the jokes. anyone disagree with that logic? I'd hate for this to degenerate into a joke directing the plot affair.

[Adam R]

Yes, I think we should work out the plot first. First, we need the outline, then we can start directing the pacing of the episode, maybe work a bit more in detail on some specific scenes. Then we can start adding jokes, filler etc.

[Stratman]

Is there any reason that the teacher even has to go missing? It feels like we're plotting ourselves into a corner, IMHO.

[Nebuchanezzar]

Is there any reason that the teacher even has to go missing? It feels like we're plotting ourselves into a corner, IMHO.

I agree, to a certain extent, but this does allow for the two plots to interact with each other at the end, tieing themselves up in a nice little bow ala' a Larry David script. You know?

[Stratman]

I agree, to a certain extent, but this does allow for the two plots to interact with each other at the end, tieing themselves up in a nice little bow ala' a Larry David script. You know?

That's a fair point, I love the way he managed that hurculean task, but this is a Simpson script, they don't really have to tie together. But it does make for a tighter script, most definitely. In any case, all I'm saying is we should consider all our options.

[moneychair2003]

we should include a refrence to mr. bergstromm (probably mispelled) in the episode.

[Adam R]

we should include a refrence to mr. bergstromm (probably mispelled) in the episode.

I should imagine at least one line would be in there in reference, but I don't want to have a line recalling old episodes just for the sake of it, it seems so forced.

[Reservoir Dog]

I have an idea. Take it or leave it. How about Homer solves a really petty mystery and someone (mabey Wiggum or Moe) gets jealous and starts competing with Homer and at the end they could both compete to try to find Gerston first to add conflict.

[Robert Benchley]

I've been working on an idea for a way to start the episode. I've got some ideas for jokes that I've put in there in brackets, but those can be ignored to the level they merit. In fact, I would recomend ignoring them; I put them there just so I could get them written down.

I figure we can start with a scene where Marge has worked hard to prepare a nice breakfast for the rest of the family, however, everyone else is in a hurry to get to work and school. Here we can lay in the fact that Lisa's class has been repeating stuff and she is excited about the fact that she believes the class will be moving on today.

[Homer is worried that Mr. Burns will fire him and that it will stick this time. Homer talks about this being a "for-realsies" firing and explains to Marge that he is a man that needs a job as mentally stimulating as being a saftey inspector, riddle solver, or some sort of detective. Marge contends that Homer misses work all the time. Homer refuses to be insulted anymore and leaves.
Bart can say something like: "I'd love to stay, Mom, but you know how Milhouse gets if I miss the bus." Then Bart imitates Milhouse crying. Marge gets annoyed thinking about how much Milhouse cries and sends Bart on his way. When Bart gets on the bus, Milhouse is drying his eyes and telling Bart the he didn't think that he was coming.]

When everyone is out of the house, Marge is a little depressed about the family not spending time together, but she perks up when she sees an ad on TV promoting a family game night. She searches through the family games and ends up settling on Clue for the Simpsons family game night.
Then the rest of the story can follow. We can have Lisa and her class, then the family playing clue and Homer being obsessed, etc. etc.

So, the relevant part is: Marge wants the family to spend time together, they don't so she plans a family game night. I think this lets the groundwork be set for the two plots. Lisa can mention school and then the family plays the game that gets Homer obsessed.

[Nameless]

I figure we can start with a scene where Marge has worked hard to prepare a nice breakfast for the rest of the family, however, everyone else is in a hurry to get to work and school. Here we can lay in the fact that Lisa's class has been repeating stuff and she is excited about the fact that she believes the class will be moving on today.

NOT FUNNY

Marge & Lisa should be on fire for some reason

Bart can say something like: "I'd love to stay, Mom, but you know how Milhouse gets if I miss the bus." Then Bart imitates Milhouse crying.

I think this joke would work better without Bart imitating Milhouse at the end.

If we're working on act 1, should the episode start with the A-plot or the B-plot being introduced? If the A-plot we could start with a school scene, and if the B-plot we could start with a house scene (and have some reason for Homer to play the board game in the first place).

There are like 2 dozen versions of Clue so we can have fun deciding which one to use.

[Stratman]

If we're working on act 1, should the episode start with the A-plot or the B-plot being introduced? If the A-plot we could start with a school scene, and if the B-plot we could start with a house scene (and have some reason for Homer to play the board game in the first place).

You always establish the A-story first. You are right about the first scene needing to be funny, btw. Always start strong, hook the viewer... or reader.

[Adam R]

There are like 2 dozen versions of Clue so we can have fun deciding which one to use.

How about Simpsons Clue?

I think that we don't need to start the plot at the school, a family/breakfast scene might be better, because we'll need time to show Lisa being excited about school, plus it makes it easier to find away to introduce the chain of events leading to Homer's story also.

[Sniper Squirrel]

Maybe Mr. Gerston doesn't have o go missing and insead he can do something sinister, like betray Lisa by taking all the credit for her hard work, and Homer could investigate a different mystery invovling a series regular, or he could still investigate a regular character's disappearance

[Stratman]

Maybe a student goes missing instead?

[Nebuchanezzar]

Adam, I think we need more leadership with this. I know that I have no fucking clue what to do next, and I'm pretty sure that most people are holding out for some direction. Take charge, my man.

[Adam R]

Yeah, I was beginning to think the same thing. I rarely go in this forum, so I often forget to see what's happening in here. For one, we need more of the writers/contributors contributing to this thread, just to get people to start speculating about what will happen and come up with some ideas. I'll send out a PM to all that haven't posted so far.

As for us sorting out what happens, this is a general plan for the episode at the moment, if anyone thinks that this needs to be changed, don't hesitate to mention it:


Act 1: Opening scenes. Homer playing Clue is introduced and Lisa's frustration at school is shown. Act ends with the new teacher coming to the school.

Act 2: Homer starts trying to solve mysteries (a couple of examples will probably be in here). Lisa is shown as taking a liking to the new teacher and the other parents start to complain. Act ends with the news that the teacher has gone missing.

Act 3: Lisa consults Homer to help find the teacher. Nothing else to put here at the moment, because the ending isn't quite decided yet.


I think we should work through the episode getting a clear idea of what will happen. So we'll start working on act one. Currently, I like this idea:

I figure we can start with a scene where Marge has worked hard to prepare a nice breakfast for the rest of the family, however, everyone else is in a hurry to get to work and school. Here we can lay in the fact that Lisa's class has been repeating stuff and she is excited about the fact that she believes the class will be moving on today.

[Homer is worried that Mr. Burns will fire him and that it will stick this time. Homer talks about this being a "for-realsies" firing and explains to Marge that he is a man that needs a job as mentally stimulating as being a saftey inspector, riddle solver, or some sort of detective. Marge contends that Homer misses work all the time. Homer refuses to be insulted anymore and leaves.
Bart can say something like: "I'd love to stay, Mom, but you know how Milhouse gets if I miss the bus." Then Bart imitates Milhouse crying. Marge gets annoyed thinking about how much Milhouse cries and sends Bart on his way. When Bart gets on the bus, Milhouse is drying his eyes and telling Bart the he didn't think that he was coming.]

When everyone is out of the house, Marge is a little depressed about the family not spending time together, but she perks up when she sees an ad on TV promoting a family game night. She searches through the family games and ends up settling on Clue for the Simpsons family game night.
Then the rest of the story can follow. We can have Lisa and her class, then the family playing clue and Homer being obsessed, etc. etc.

So, the relevant part is: Marge wants the family to spend time together, they don't so she plans a family game night. I think this lets the groundwork be set for the two plots. Lisa can mention school and then the family plays the game that gets Homer obsessed.

But if you have a different idea, pitch it or just work on this one and we'll see what the group thinks is best. So anyway, let's start working on this opening and remember people, always ask yourself "What would Sideshow Mel say here?"

[Captain Edwell]

Act 3: Lisa consults Homer to help find the teacher. Nothing else to put here at the moment, because the ending isn't quite decided yet.

Maybe another teacher takes over the advanced studies group and completely runs it into the ground? Either as a scene unto itself, or Lisa relating it to Homer when convincing him to find Gerston.

If so, I've got plenty of stories to share about how such a class can go wrong.

we should include a refrence to mr. bergstromm (probably mispelled) in the episode.

Actually, doesn't "Gerston" sound a little too close to "Bergstrom"?

[Snack Related Mishap]

Yeah, when I came up with the idea a family breakfast scene is exactly what I was thinking. I actually really like how Robert Benchley layed it out, because it was very close to what I was thinking. Adam R's outline was also very close to what I imagined, except I wanted the teachers to start the Advanced Learning classes before Act One ends just so we have time to expand on it over the end of the first act, and until the second act. However, it's not like we are consrticted to a time like the normal writers, so Adam's outline may work better than what I originally thought of.

Also, I know this isn't the time to be pitching jokes, but I don't want to forget it, so I thought I would post it. Adam had in his outline that we should show examples of Homer trying to solve myteries, so I thought of this scene.

[HOMER and MARGE are watching TV]

[On the TV]

NARRATOR(V.O.): Now back to Murder Watch!

WOMAN: You gotta find who killed my brother, Casey, you gotta.

DET. CASEY: Believe me if I'm on the job, this bastard won't be doing any getting-awaying.

[HOMER suddenly seems ver proud of himself.]

HOMER: Marge, I solved the mystery. The person who killed her brother was the scuba diver. He burried his body in the water on one of his routine missions to research the coral reef.

[HOMER puts on a monacle and begins to smoke a pipe.]

MARGE(dismade): Homer, of course you solved it. This is a repeat of the episode we watched last night.

HOMER(sad): Ohhh, I'll never be any good at this.

MARGE: Oh come on, don't say that, you solved the mystery of who ate the apple pie I baked.

HOMER: Yeah, but that's because it was me.

MARGE: Now Homie, don't get discouraged. This stuff just takes time, that's all. Chuck Yeager couldn't fly jets when he was a baby, but look at him now. He's one of the most famous pilots in history.

HOMER: You're right, Marge. I shouldn't let my mental shortcomings stop me. I'm gonna solve some mysteries.

MARGE: Good. Could you start by finding the remote?

[gomez]

Yeah, when I came up with the idea a family breakfast scene is exactly what I was thinking. I actually really like how Robert Benchley layed it out, because it was very close to what I was thinking. Adam R's outline was also very close to what I imagined, except I wanted the teachers to start the Advanced Learning classes before Act One ends just so we have time to expand on it over the end of the first act, and until the second act. However, it's not like we are consrticted to a time like the normal writers, so Adam's outline may work better than what I originally thought of.

Also, I know this isn't the time to be pitching jokes, but I don't want to forget it, so I thought I would post it. Adam had in his outline that we should show examples of Homer trying to solve myteries, so I thought of this scene.

[HOMER and MARGE are watching TV]

[On the TV]

NARRATOR(V.O.): Now back to Murder Watch!

WOMAN: You gotta find who killed my brother, Casey, you gotta.

DET. CASEY: Believe me if I'm on the job, this bastard won't be doing any getting-awaying.

[HOMER suddenly seems ver proud of himself.]

HOMER: Marge, I solved the mystery. The person who killed her brother was the scuba diver. He burried his body in the water on one of his routine missions to research the coral reef.

[HOMER puts on a monacle and begins to smoke a pipe.]

MARGE(dismade): Homer, of course you solved it. This is a repeat of the episode we watched last night.

HOMER(sad): Ohhh, I'll never be any good at this.

MARGE: Oh come on, don't say that, you solved the mystery of who ate the apple pie I baked.

HOMER: Yeah, but that's because it was me.

MARGE: Now Homie, don't get discouraged. This stuff just takes time, that's all. Chuck Yeager couldn't fly jets when he was a baby, but look at him now. He's one of the most famous pilots in history.

HOMER: You're right, Marge. I shouldn't let my mental shortcomings stop me. I'm gonna solve some mysteries.

MARGE: Good. Could you start by finding the remote?

suggestion: could this dialogue end with

HOMER: Not to worry, Marge, I'm on the case. [He begins stroking his chin while his arms are crossed, we see that the remote is in his other hand, then suddenly] I've got it! [Realizing it's in his hand, dissapointed] Oh...

and maybe end the "Oh..." with something he wanted to do as part of finding the remote, but now won't get to do. like "i guess i won't be going to sea world", or "i won't be needing a chocolate chess set". eh?

by the way, i probably won't be able to attend most of the meetings, i'll just post my suggestions here and someone can quote and reply with whether or not it goes. k?

[sung]

Well I just took a good look at the story on the first page... the first and second act, not bad, not bad. Chief Wiggum being a jerkass just gives me a problem, but overall, it looks good.

I do agree that kidnapping is a little bit crazy idea... Here is an idea I thought of:

He actually quit his job and Dr. Frink employed him as an assistant. Lisa then urges him to come back to school and face the music. (this idea I kicked in in case if you guys want that he ran away. I didn't read the whole 8 page thread)

It's meant to be Chuck becomes depressed over all the criticism the parents are giving him

Reminds me of the book "There's A Boy In Girl's Bathroom" by Louis Sachar.

[Kiyosuki]

Hmmm. Do you think I could make a suggestion or two Adam? Maybe I can PM them to you within the next few days?

[Adam R]

Ivan, I think your idea is pretty well constructed and there's definitely some elements of that that I like and think can be worked into the script, but I don't really like the solution. He would only be gone because he was listening to Homer's story? It relates very little to the parents being angry at him. I like MattG_Fan's original ending the best at the moment, but don't be afraid to pitch more ideas if you have them.

We're getting a pretty good idea for the layout at the moment. We need to start chronologically working through the episode now, I think. A family breakfast scene seems to be the most popular idea for an opening, we just need to plan out what happens there.

However, if there are some scenes that you want to pitch now, go for it, but try and concentrate on the beginning at the moment. I have one idea for a specific scene, when the family are playing Clue, I would like to see most of it as a fantasy sequence of the family in a Clue atmosphere. Sorta like the trilogy episodes, but good (hopefully). Not only will it be more interesting than the family just sitting around playing the game, but it'll also help to show how involved Homer feels with it.

Hmmm. Do you think I could make a suggestion or two Adam? Maybe I can PM them to you within the next few days?

Sure. I am open to some suggestions from non-writers, as long as it's not too excessive. If we decide to use it, we'll be sure to give you a contributor credit. :thumbsup

[Charlie]

Ivan, I think your idea is pretty well constructed and there's definitely some elements of that that I like and think can be worked into the script, but I don't really like the solution. He would only be gone because he was listening to Homer's story? It relates very little to the parents being angry at him.

REVISED!

It's meant to be Chuck becomes depressed over all the criticism the parents are giving him over the special classes, so he goes to Moe's to "drown out his sorrows" before the after-school class. He realizes Homer is there and starts talking to him about the parents, before realizing Homer seems to be disinterested in what he has to say. Mr. Gerston asks what's wrong with Homer, to which Homer replies he too feels down and out since his family has become bored with his mystery solving.

^And throughout that entire scene, I was thinking about changing between shots of Lisa trying to find Homer, and Homer and Chuck talking about their problems...but instead of actually showing Chuck and Homer having a conversation, it only shows one character at a time (for example: Shot of Lisa -> close up of Chuck telling part of his problem with the parents -> Shot of Lisa -> Close up of Homer saying how no one cares about his mystery solving -> Shot of Lisa -> Close up of Chuck with more of his problems -> Shot of Lisa -> Close up of Homer with more of his problems -> Pan with Lisa as she runs up to the door of Moe's...she pulls it open as the camera snaps around and zooms out from behind Homer and Chuck, showing that they are sitting in Moe's drinking).