Chalkboard, Billboard, and Couch Gag Thread!

[Jesse Pinkman]

this joke has not been done in HD, so it's technically new

[The Governor]

A Flash Mob does not mean what I think it does.

[Financial Panther]

A Flash Mob does not mean what I think it does.

Took me a second to get that. Good one!

[Dandu386]

I will not wet dem dry bones.

[lolcats]

When I ask the questions, I cannot expect the answer to be anything positive.

[biffwestwood]

They must use this one in the season premier:

I will not demand an apology for Lady Gaga's appearance in the last episode.

(The word not has a line through it in every sentence)

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

Chalkboard: asdf
Couch gag: qwerty

[lolcats]

Chalkboard: THERE WAS A BOY NEMED BART AND THEN THERES THESE KIDS THAT WANT HIM TO GO TO HELL OOOOO

Couch Gag: Homer gags on his self-respect.

[The Governor]

More blackboard quotes:

FAILURE IS NOT A SHORTCUT TO LEARNING

THE NFL IS NOT OFFICIATED BY FOOT LOCKER

[Handsome B. Wonderful]

​COMIC SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANS

[Coin945]

I did not have sexual relations with that woman

I will not use the blackboard for political commentary.

I will nt use cnstrained writing

I will not dance like nobody's watching

I am not more popular than jesus

I don't believe i can fly and touch the sky

I don't wonder where ive been, who i am, do i fit it

Teachers are not a source for comic gold

Badmouthing education will not change the system

[wiley207]

I WIL NOT MISPELL ON PURPOUS

[Bella Drape 'er]

I will not air a Halloween episode after Halloween.

[ZeoNet]

Mitt Romney's first name is not 'Williard'.

(It is)

[Spiff]

"My homework didn't burn up because I divided by zero."

[biffwestwood]

I have no clue if "The Family Guy Movie" will ever be made.

[N]

"Who reads these anyway?"

[Financial Panther]

They've already had something very similar to that (who even reads these anymore?).

[simpsonsbart]

I don't create a chalkboard, billboard or couch gag, but I create an opening. It's a THOH version.

Screen title
Duffman drives the Duff's dirigible, but he's killed by Snorky (THOH XI), which he takes his hat and his glasses and takes the wheel.

Billboard gag
We can see Doctor Hibbert with Fox-Burns (THOH XIII). There is written below: If you're tired to be a human, go to my island.

Chalkboard gag
Bart, in next to Hugo (THOH VII) writes on the chalkboard (with blood): "I'm not the kind twin, it's Hugo, this is Hugo who is", the the bell rings. Bart mounts on a skateboard, and Hugo mounts on a skateboard too, and begins to pursue him. Bart lands on deceased Barney.

At the nuclear power plant, zombies Lenny and Carl (THOH XX) hang a banner where it's marked "Ti be in shape, zombies, eat 5 brains per days". Homer poses his plutonium bar and takes off his worker coat. We discover that he has Snake's hair (THOH IX), but with another hairstyle. His hair are doing Snake's hairstyle, lights a cigarette and goes away, while smoking her.

At the commercial centre, Lion-Patty and Elephant-Selma (THOH XIII) present their merchandise on the carpet. Marge with beard (THOH XII) reads the magasine "How to cook for 40 humans", with Kang on the cover. Alien-Maggie (THOH IX) passes on the carpet, the cashier takes her and puts her in a bag. Once in the cart she extits of the bag, turning to Gerald and terrorizes him with leaving her pacifier out of her mouth and showing him her tooth.

In solfeggio, the children are playing their instruments. Slug-Lisa (THOH III) plays too slowmy and Largo asks her to go away. Lisa goes away, but returns a time for drooling on the floor.

In the street, Snake-Homer leaves the cigarette from this mouth and balances it out his car, and the cigarette burns Otto, sitted on a bench. Bart, pursued by Hugo, zigzags between Sideshow Bob, Helen Lovejoy, R2D2-Apu (THOH XVI), who trying to keep his lemurs octuplets (THOH XIII), Hugh Hefner-Moe (THOH XVI), Comic Book Guy as vendor of antiques (THOH XV), Disco Stu as Big Bang Stu (THOH XVII) and Pig-Wiggum (THOH XIII).

Alien-Maggie drives a small spacial wheel. In fact, it's she who driving the car because Marge's beard is entangled in the wheel connected to the car. Maggie honks.

Fast scroll is done with Zombies-Springfieldians (THOH XX), except those who have already gone in the opening.

Bart and Hugo continue their pursuit, pass on Snake-Homer's hood car, which exits to the car, Slug-Lisa happens that frightens him, and gets hit by Marge's car (drived by Maggie Alien-Maggie).

The family arrives on the couch and tries to sit, except the sofa, who is living, scornfullies them. Snake-Homer takes a gun and shoots it. They sit down, but Bart bites Hugo and Alien-Maggie bites Slug-Lisa and drinks her blood. Marge with beard turns on the TV with the plutonium remote (THOH IX).

[The Governor]

Gangnam style is not extra credit.

[Jetthead]

"I will not push principal Skinner into the lion enclosure at the zoo."

[Kid Moe]

"I will not endorse a pointless celebrity cameo."

[Coin945]

You're about 14 years too late for that one to be said with any kind of political commentary involved. Nowadays it would just sound like an apology and a promise to never do it again...

[HerbertMcHoover]

"Nobody cares about Moe's bar rag."

Before the Justin Bieber episode: "We're going to regret this."

[LardLad14]

Chalkboard Gag - I will not leak anymore plots over the internet.
Billboard Gag - Otto. Message - Attention all Bus Drivers, race on Monday!
Title Screen Gag - Pie Man swings on a rope across the screen throwing a pie at the viewers.
Couch Gag - All the Simpsons are sitting on chairs at the Barber Shop and exchange hair styles with other members of the family. They then go to the costume shop and dress according to their hair. Marge is Homer, Homer is Maggie, Maggie is Lisa, Lisa is Bart and Bart is Marge. Marge who is Homer walks to Moes while the rest of the family run onto the couch.

I have more ideas . . .
Billboard Gag - Sea Captain. Message - Channel 11 News! Aarrgghhh, I am the News ANCHOR!
Title Screen Gag - The Duff Blimp flies past while Barney on a Hot Air Balloon jumps off and grabs onto the blimp.
Chalkboard Gag - Tony Hawk skates into the class as Bart writes, I will not bring Guest Stars to school!
Couch Gag - To the tune of the Snake Charmer the simpsons gradually pop out of straw baskets, like snakes.

Even more ideas . . .
Billboard Gag - Lindsday Neagle. Message - I've got a new job! Call: NEAGLE 300 NEAGLE.
Title Screen Gag - The Head of a Giant Monument is seen from the bottom of the screen. It is Mr. Burns. A man climbs to the top and lights it on fire.
Chalkboard Gag - I will not promote the show during 'actual' class time.
Couch Gag - The Simpsons dressed as Eskimos run into their Igloo after being chased by a Polar Bear.

[dasda11]

Your idea is very good I also like you is the best I have ever seen

[Parzan]

I will not Jump the Shark