Rate/Review Family Guy "Brian the Bachelor"

**Ryan** · 06-26-2005, 03:47 PM

It's Sunday!! Hooray! That means new Family Guy. Tonight's ep description:

When "The Bachelorette" comes to Quahog, Brian is chosen to be a contestant.

Ooookkaayyy....it could be funny, it could be a stinker. We'll see, but just as a reminder, there won't be a new episode for the next two weeks, since July 3rd has...yes, of course: "The Lost World". Yeah, you're were all expecting ID4, weren't you?...

Discuss!

**The General** · 06-26-2005, 05:32 PM

"Well, the episode is running a bit short this week. Hey, let's have Stewie talk pointlessly for 5 minutes!"

2/5

**Binky** · 06-26-2005, 05:33 PM

Did anyone recognize Nancy Cartwright in the episode?

**Andy** · 06-26-2005, 05:33 PM

I knew it! Nancy Cartwright was the voice of the female Snork.

Lots of funny bits, the novel joke(s) were okay, kinda figured they'd stretch it out that long, but whatever. They kept the no-Loretta continuity, and well... that's pretty much it. Gave me a good laugh as usual.

**Semaj** · 06-26-2005, 05:35 PM

Another black eye for reality television.

Michael Eisner got zinged again! :laugh:

4/5

**Wasteland** · 06-26-2005, 05:39 PM

OK, but disturbed by Quagmire and his mom. 4/5

**Wavy Gravy** · 06-26-2005, 05:42 PM

Stewie's two "novel" runs was this week's token "goes on too damn long" gag. It's sad, really - I actually expect them to draw out gags too long now. I was actually pleasantly surprised when Brian only writhed in pain for four seconds after getting hit with the phone. Though I liked the way Brian's plot played out, I think Chris' subplot was a bit on the border between "acceptably weird" and "freakish". Also, I think they took Herbert's appearance a little too far (and since I own the script for "The Courtship of Stewie's Father", I know it's only gonna get worse, believe me). Fewer disjointed cutaways equals good news, but Peter's cow kite was beyond the limit of humorously stupid to just stupid. At least they're keeping continuity with Cleveland and Loretta still being broken up, but if it's gonna keep resulting in jokes as forced as the obvious "Hey, FOX, Peter and Cleveland are naked and you can't nail us for it because you just uncancelled us" scene, I don't think I'll like it.

2.5/5 - I'm starting to worry now.

**The General** · 06-26-2005, 05:42 PM

Originally Posted by Wasteland

OK, but disturbed by Quagmire and his mom.

I thought that was the funniest joke of the episode, personally...

**Malachy** · 06-26-2005, 05:45 PM

Okay, here's my big ass review I wrote while the episode was airing. Some of the stuff isn't in chronological order but...whatever.

Stewie as a toker was great. It's good that they kept him looking the same as in the other flash-forwards. That was really the only scene I laughed outrageously hard at.

The "trademark" extended joke was terrible, as always. Stewie going on about a novel for a minute in a half...twice...wow, what a bunch of shit. The first time it was bad, but the second time was just intolerable. For the first time this season, I actually got the grim thought that maybe Family Guy isn't what it used to be...

I'm getting sick of Herbet. He was funny in "To Love And Die In Dixie" with the umpteen messages of the answering machine...but even in "From Method To Madness" the joke was tired. The evil monkey return was bad too, but not quite as painful. Why are they bringing back all these one-off characters, and disgracing them so horribly?

The Quagmire is a pervert bit has gone too far. I mean...date rape drugs? I liked him better when he was like Boomhauer on King of the Hill. He was with a lot of women, and you could tell that maybe he was a little obsessed, but now he just comes off as sexually disturbed.

Peter welcoming Brian home: classic. It was just great, but Brian saying something along the lines of, 'Remember...I just explained it to you like 2 or 3 minutes ago.' just sealed the deal. One of the few great jokes of the episode.

The Quagmire's mother scene had potential...but it was ruined by turning it into another characterization of Quagmire is a pervert. It would have been great if it was just Quagmire saying, "Mittens, shut up!". That part I laughed at.

Michael Eisner yelling, "No givesies backsies!" and then tripping on the ground was pretty funny. It made me think though...during season 2 or 3 a joke like this would have just been common...but now it's actually notable. I think that says something about the overall quality of the episode/s.

The Chris's pimple subplot was retarded. I hated it from the beginning, as the episode went on, I hated it more.

Brian obsessing over Brooke was very out of character. Brian has lost control of his usually cool and collected self this season more times than ever.

Act 1: Terrible
Act 2: Better than Act 1, nothing great
Act 3: Another improvement over Act 1, but still nothing great.

D

If I had been given the choice, I would have rather they aired the new American Dad.

**Samuel L Bronkowitz** · 06-26-2005, 05:52 PM

I initially hated the bit with Stewie rambling about Brian's unfinished book, but I laughed right away at the callback...go figure. Pretty good episode, I'll give it an unofficial 3.5/5 for the time being...

Was that Jessica Biel's voice I was hearing?

**BartLisa35** · 06-26-2005, 05:58 PM

yes, Jessica Biel guest-starred as Brooke

also, pretty average, I liked Jessica Biel, there was good chemistry

3/5

**reyontoyeny** · 06-26-2005, 06:01 PM

I've been rather generous to Family Guy, but this episode had a everylittle annoying aspect that I don't like about the show in general. I hate that old guy who wants to molest Chris. The monkey in Chris's closet was never funny to begin with. Stewie's extended rant about novels wasn't funny the first time and there wasn't any reason to have it again. Despite this, I did like the whole zit subplot for some reason, and the cow/kite joke. I usually don't give low scores, but this episode was that 1.5/5 that I've been waiting to give.

**Semaj** · 06-26-2005, 06:22 PM

They did explain why the monkey is evil, but they never explained why he's hanging out in Chris' closet.

Crotis Jivefunk · 06-26-2005, 06:28 PM

I just caught the third act, but I enjoyed what I saw. Best part so far was Stewie talking about Brian's novel. B for now, will write more after I watch it on tape.

Edit: Just wow. C

**skittlebrau** · 06-26-2005, 07:42 PM

Hmm, this wasn't great at all. I probably only laughed at Eisner and the Snorks. Perverted old man's appearance just didn't need to happen (much like the giant chicken), and I like 80s references as much as any other twentysomething, but sometimes they just don't go with anything (He-Man's appearance). Chris's subplot was just...weird, and Quagmire's gone from a loveable pervert to a downright sickening, sadistic bastard. What the hell?

2/5 (really on the verge of a 1/5)

**Colburn** · 06-26-2005, 08:36 PM

I enjoyed it somewhat, had some good references (the "Animal House" and "Fast Times at Ridgemont High(?)" parodies), but there were also some overstretched and unfunny gags. C

**Ryan** · 06-26-2005, 08:38 PM

Um...okay, we get a parody of "Little Shop of Horrors" with a parody of "Animal House" happening at the same time? Well...this is Family Guy.

The snorks was just funny, and also Eisner...but, I have to say I enjoyed the episode. Hated Stewie's novel talk the first time 'round, but the end one got me laughing (better done). And I do agree about Quagmire, he's gotten wrong. Need an absurd sex joke? Better go with Quagmire.

Oh, and I'm surprised no one's mentioned this gem.

Lois: Look Stewie, here comes the airplane!
Stewie: (throwing the spoon out of Lois' hand) And I suppose the pilot was JFK Jr. Oh, even I felt that to be in bad taste.

4/5

**pat** · 06-26-2005, 08:39 PM

i'm not gonna lie to you, that was the worst episode of family guy ever. with the exception of a couple parts, i just mostly sat there with a blank stare on my face. hardly anything about it was funny at all. it should also be fitting that the worst gag ever (stewie rambling about brian's novel) was contained in the worst episode ever. basically, the whole episode was just one huge fucking bore.

1/5

**Clarence** · 06-26-2005, 08:50 PM

4/5 Wow, my first new Family Guy episode I watched, although I only seen bits and pieces of it while chatting with people on msn, I really liked it. The show didn't decline I thought.

**skittlebrau** · 06-26-2005, 08:57 PM

Originally Posted by Pat

it should also be fitting that the worst gag ever (stewie rambling about brian's novel) was contained in the worst episode ever.

Agreed. I was sitting there thinking "Alright already!". To do it twice was torture.

**Dr. Horrible** · 06-27-2005, 04:56 AM

i didn't like stewie's rambling bit but i thought it was a good episode

while the chris understory sucked, it contained a lot of decent jokes with animal house parody being the best one

i don't know why everyone is so upset about the quagmire date rape drug thing, "martini and a rufee coolata" i thought it was actually a funny joke that he jsut realized the cameras were on him

**HomertheGreat** · 06-27-2005, 05:03 AM

I thought the jokes got a little better, but the Stewie novel joke was just awful to sit threw. Also while I don't give the plots of Family Guy that much attention, just because the jokes are what make the episode, I still thought the zit/Chris sub-plot was awful. I'm not sure I laughed once at it. So slight improvement over last weeks and a few others this season, but still pretty mediocre. C/C+

**Paul** · 06-27-2005, 07:11 AM

what a horrible trainwreck of an episode. D-

**stevedude530** · 06-27-2005, 10:10 AM

Shockingly, I'm not as mad about this episode as everyone else. And I wrote the "What's Wrong with Family Guy" thread. But the Stewie joke, waaaaaaaaaay too long! Him smoking pot was funny though. "That's enough, John Mayer" was funny, and Chris going "I am in no mood!" to evil monkey was plausible.

Herbert sucked, and who else fears that every time a character gets hurt the gag's going to last about 3 minutes. Lois' Hall & Oates cut-away was somewhat humourous, but overall, a just mediocre episode.

**Alpha** · 06-27-2005, 10:13 AM

Originally Posted by Wavy Gravy

2.5/5 - I'm starting to worry now.

Me too. I've enjoyed most episodes this season, but this was really disappointing.

Stewie talking about Brian's novel was one of the worst jokes they've had in the show's history (and it was even worse the second time).

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