"stomp a worm and it shall be rainy"




"What would you do if you were Matt G.'s son?"
-Verticly_Amazing- from Official The Simpsons Forum.
"Get out of my house."
-Exodus




"We the purple? What the hell was that?"
-mcstink




Well its easier to chew than that Bambi video - funny...
Moe: What are you telling us, were trapped like rats?
Russ Cargill: No, rats can't be trapped this easily, you're trapped like... carrots.
Sergeant: "Simpson! See you at reveille, 0500 tomorrow."
Auditor: "See you at the IRS!"
Rev. Lovejoy: "See you in hell!
... From heaven."



Dr. Nick performing triple bypass surgery on Homer---What the hell is that?
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Top 2 jokes:
2.Somebody had to take the babysitter home. Then I noticed she was sitting on-her-sweet-can. So I grabbed-her-sweet can. Oh, just thinking about-her-can. I just wish I had-her-sweet-sweet-s-s-sweet can!
1. Homer-Hey you $#@*, you cut me off. $#*@ to you!
Lisa- Dad, that's an ambulance
Homer-Right, honey. Hey ambulance! You think you're so big with your $@#^ *%$# siren. And your letters are on backwards!
Top 3 THOH Qoutes:
3. Selma as Homer runs naked across kitchen-There goes the last lingering thread of my heterosexuality.
2. Delirious Mr. Burns-I was walking through the gas one day!
1. Flanders-Hey, Homer, mind if I chew your ear
(Homer shoots Flanders)
Bart-Dad, you killed the zombie Flanders
Homer-He was a zombie?




Moe-"Hey Homa...look at my new product I created while you were trying to take away a stick from an old lady."
Homer-"Look at this thing, oh it feels so good to have a stick by your side...Oh-"
Moe-"Would you shut up already! Why don't you just taste my new product?
Homer-"Ok Moe, I'll have 2 Mugs."
Moe-"Here ya go Homa, tell me if it's good"
-Homer reached to get the Mug when sudenly his stick fell onto the Mug and Moe's product spilled all over the counter.
Homer-"Damn stick! I'll kill you..."
-Homer picked up the stick and broke it into 1 half. he used one broken side of the stick to hit another side.
Homer-"HAHAHA! I bet you don't like that, hehe...Die already!"
Moe-"Homa, sticks don't die, so's with the hitting. They don't feel anything at all."
Homer-"D'oh!"
-Homer got angry and threw them out side of the Bar.
There was a car passing by and it ran over the sticks smashing them into pieces.
Homer-"HAHAHA! Now you Die...stupid little sticks.
-Nick Simpson




Lisa: "Dad, we did something very bad!"
Homer: "Did you wreck the car?"
Bart: "No!"
Homer: "Did you raise the dead?
Lisa: "Yes!"
Homer: "But the car's okay?"
Kids: "Uh-huh."
Homer: "All right then."
Seasons Rankings:
4,3,7,6,5,2,1,8,16,15,9,14,13,12,10,11
Homer: "Takes one to know one!"




Bart: "Hello, this is a friend of Harry Plow, is he at the Bar right now?"
Moe: "One sec, I'll check for you...Is Harry Plow in the house?"
--Lisa and Bart started to laugh.
Moe: "Wait a minute, who is this...You little punks, if I see you call me again, I'll rip your heads and put 'em in the grinder."
Lisa and Bart: "HAHAHAHA!"
-Nick Simpson




Patty: Marge, I've got two and a half words for you. Gulp N Blow.
"Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen."



*Homer drinks from beer bottle hidden inside his fake bible and gags*
"Time for the gospels according to puke!" :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:



"Elmo go to wrong fundraiser..." :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:




Lisa- "Mom, can you take me to school today please..."
Marge- "No honey, I think you should go on the school bus with Bart."
Bart- "No mom! Lisa's ruined my day yesterday, I don't want to even talk to her."
Lisa- "Oh shut up Bart, the only reason I ruined your day was because you and Milhouse put a sign on Principle Skinner's back [Kick Me!]and I was standing behind him when he noticed he had a sign on his back.
Marge- "Bart...please forgive your sister for disrespecting you.
Lisa- "But mom! Bart's the one who got me in trouble."
Bart- "Shut up Lisa, and go do my Home Work."
Lisa- "Yes Bart..."
-Bart woke up from his dream and said to himself "Oh cool, what a dream, I wish life was like this."
-------------------------------------------
--Nick Simpson
"I haven't said anything for a while."
What episode's this from?Originally Posted by Nick Simpson
"Look, Marge, you don't know what it's like. I'm the one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I'm not out of order! You're out of order. The whole freaking system is out of order. You want the truth? You want the truth? You can't handle the truth! 'Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do! Forget it, Marge, it's Chinatown."



Homer: Tell the boss I'm going to the car with my wife and I won't be back for ten minutes!

Originally Posted by Leopold
what episode is that from?
Secrets of a Successful Marriage, season 5.what episode is that from?
Bart - "Take him away boys"
Chief Wiggum - "Hey! I'm supposed to say that,take him away toys"
Lou - "What did you say Chief?"
Wiggum - "Just do what the kid said"




I bring you love.
Dr. Hibbert: Is that the love between a man and a woman, or the love of a man for a fine Cuban cigar?



Moe: Hello
Hi, I'm looking for Ivana, last name Tinkle.
Moe: Ivana Tinkle? Is there an Ivana Tinkle here? Alright, everyone put down your glasses, Ivana Tinkle!




"Stop bugging me Bart." -Marge




If you're happy and you know it say a swear... mittens!

Cool, thanks for the infoOriginally Posted by Leopold
Comic Book Guy:Ooh, a sarcasm detector. Oh, that's a *real* useful invention. [the detector beeps rapidly and explodes]
Last edited by Tad Winslow; 10-23-2004 at 02:56 AM.



Mr. Burns: I think someone likes me up there.
Smithers: Someone likes you down here, too.
Mr. Burns: Shut Up!
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