Quote of the Day Thread

[Gunstar]

"Dammit Smithers, this isn't rocket science, it's brain surgery!"

[The Foot]

Marge: Kids, tell me when you father stops scratching himself?
(long pause) Kids!
Bart: We'll tell ya mom.

[Alex-S-89]

Homer: Okay, before I show ya, who wants to guess how I got the money?
Bart: Dealing drugs?
Lisa: Drugs?
Marge: I'd have to say drugs too.
Homer: Close, but your way off.

[Crotis Jivefunk]

Child: "It's the Krusty Burglar!"
Homer: "Oh my god! He's stealing all the burglars! Why you little!
(Attacks him)
Emcee: "Oh, Homer, it -- it's all -- it -- it's all j -- jus -- just an act!"
Child: (crying) "Stop! Stop, he's already dead."

[Mira]

Child: "It's the Krusty Burglar!"
Homer: "Oh my god! He's stealing all the burglars! Why you little!
(Attacks him)
Emcee: "Oh, Homer, it -- it's all -- it -- it's all j -- jus -- just an act!"
Child: (crying) "Stop! Stop, he's already dead."

Hahaha, I remember that but I haven't seen it in a long time. Which episode is that from?

[Crotis Jivefunk]

Homie The Clown

[kevin]

"Yeah, that's what they all say. they all say d'oh."

[Mario]

"Ah, the catwalk. The perfect vantage point...for revenge!"
From: Day of the Jackanapes.

[The Brain]

Bart: "There's only one place it could possibly be!"
Lisa: "Bob's trailor at the construction site?"
Bart: "....That's even better! Lets go there"
Lisa: "What were you thinking?"
Bart: "The haunted mine"

[Gunstar]

"Through the midst of all the killing and skin-eating, somehow, we forgot the love."

[The Foot]

Chief Wiggum: A 341 in my own bedroom. Alright crookie, Let's dance.
( Falls on the ground)
Officer down! Officer down!

[Crotis Jivefunk]

Burns: "Yes, I'd like to send this letter to the Prussian consulate in Siam by aeromail. Am I too late for the 4:30 autogyro?"
Kid: "Uh, I better look in the manual."
Burns:Oh, the ignorance. (sees Homer and Grandma walking out) Wait a minute, I know that woman. But from when? And in what capacity? (Sees Wanted Poster) It's her. At last!"
Kid: "This book must be out of date: I don't see "Prussia", "Siam", or "autogyro".
Burns: "Well, keep looking!"

[kevin]

"Clown college? You can't eat that."

[Mario]

"I'm no supervising technichan, I'm a technical supervisor."

[Crotis Jivefunk]

Kid: "The switchboards are lighting up!"
Everyone: "Yay!"
Kid: "Two calls: that's our best ever! Hello? No, Janice doesn't live here...Hello? Yes, I am interested in long-distance savings! Very interested."

[kevin]

"We'll take the chairlift... It'll give us an eagle's-eye view of the area directly beneath the chairlift."

[Mike Scully]

CBG: "There's no emoticon for what I'm feeling!!"

Yeah, I often use that for my away message.

[Gunstar]

Nelson: "Check it out. Skinner's mopping the goo off his house! Wait 'till he finds what I left in his birdbath."

Skinner: "Noooooooooo!"

[The Brain]

"You know...we're kind of like the original Odd Couple. You're the messy one and I'm the -"
"SHUT UP!"

[Dr Zaius]

"But I did give the FBI the whereabouts of our good friend Milhouse."

"...I'm telling you, I didn't do anything."


That parody gave me a laughing seizure the first time I saw the episode.

[SLH]

Bart: "Wow, Dad, you took a baptismal for me. How do you feel?"
Homer: "Oh, Bartholomew, I feel like St. Augustine of Hippo after his conversion by Ambrose of Milan."
Ned: "Wait, Homer. What did you just say?"
Homer: "I said shut your ugly face Flanders."

[Crotis Jivefunk]

"The waiting game sucks, let's play Hungry Hungry Hippos!"

[Colburn]

Homer- That constellation up there is known as Jerry the Cowboy, and that big-dipper looking thing over there is Alan...the Cowbay

Pepi- Oh, Papa Homer, you are so learn-ed.

Homer- Learnd, child. It's prounounced learnd.

Pepi- I love you, Papa Homer

Homer- And I love you too, pepsi

Pepi- Pepi

Homer- Pepi

[chiefdan]

"Let's just say I'm sitting in the right chair."

[Radioactive Man]

"Tomorrow morning when Alison comes out of her house, we spray her with the hose soaking her from head to toe, leaving us relatively dry."

[The Old Grey Man]

"They got my bus pass" "they got my bus pass"

[kevin]

"Off a tall building! That's a great way to do it!"

[Gunstar]

"And I got up in front of them. I felt an intoxication that had nothing to do with alcohol. It was the intoxication of being a public spectacle!"

[Cap'n Crunch]

Hello lolly pop lane? Ive got a girl who ate to many sour balls!

[Mario]

"Stop! Stop, he's already dead."