so i said 'kiss my asphalt'
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so i said 'kiss my asphalt'
Love day was yesterday.
The Falcon and the D'ohman (4.5/10) Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts (4.0/10) Treehouse of Horror XXII (1.0/10) Replacable You (3.5/10) The Food Wife (4.0/10) The Book Job (8.0/10) The Man in the Blue Flannel Pants (4.0/10) The Ten-Per-Cent Solution (4.5/10) Holidays of Future Passed (8.5/10) Politically Inept, With Homer Simpson (3.5/10) The D'oh-cial Network (2.5/10) Moe Goes From Rags to Riches (1.5/10) The Daughter Also Rises (5.0/10) At Long Last Leave (2.5/10) Exit Through the Kwik-E-Mart (1.0/10) How I Wet Your Mother (4.0/10) Them, Robot (3.0/10) Beware My Cheating Bart (5.0/10) A Totally Fun Thing That Bart Will Never Do Again (3.0/10) The Spy Who Learned Me (3.5/10) Ned 'N' Edna's Blend (5.5/10) Lisa Goes Gaga (1.0/10)
"8:45? and here i am, yapping away like it's 8:35!"
We're through the looking glass here people
Mona: [singing] How many roads must a man walk down, before you can call him a man?
Lisa: No dad, it's a rhetorical question.
Homer: Rhetorical, eh? Eight!
"Dear Lisa: As I write this, I am very sad. Our president has been overthrown and replaced by the benevolent General Krull. All hail Krull and his glorious new regime. Sincerely, Little Girl."
The original Favorite and least favorite by season
Shorts: 1: The Pacifier Watching TV 2: World War III Maggie's Brain 3: Bathtime Scary Movie
Episodes: 1: Krusty Gets Busted The Telltale Head 2: Bart Gets an F The War of the Simpsons 3: Homer at the Bat Separate Vocations 4: Brother From the Same Planet Krusty Gets Kancelled 5: Cape Feare $pringfield 6: Homer Badman Lisa on Ice 7: King-Size Homer Lisa the Iconoclast 8: Simpsoncalifragilisticexpialad'ohcious The Simpsons Spin-Off Showcase 9: Girly Edition The Trouble with Trillions 10: Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo Homer Simpson in: "Kidney Trouble" 11: Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner? Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder 12: HOMЯ Tennis the Menace 13: Tales from the Public Domain She of Little Faith 14: The Dad Who Knew Too Little Helter Shelter 15: The Ziff Who Came to Dinner Bart-Mangled Banner 16: Don't Fear the Roofer She Used to Be My Girl 17: My Fair Laddy The Italian Bob 18: The Haw-Hawed Couple You Kent Always Say What You Want 19: Funeral for a Fiend All About Lisa 20: Gone Maggie Gone Four Great Women and a Manicure 21: The Bob Next Door The Color Yellow 22: Homer Scissorhands How Munched is That Birdie in the Window? 23: The Falcon and the D'ohman A Totally Fun Thing That Bart Will Never Do Again 24: Hardly Kirk-ing What Animated Women Want
Let me have one of those porno magazines, large box of condoms, a bottle of Old Harper, a couple of those panty shields, and some illegal fireworks, AND one of those disposable enemas, eh make it two.
I don't know what you have planned tonight Homer but count me out
Ned: I guess it's time for me to duck again...
Homer: No, I want everyone to know that: this is Ned Flanders, my friend!
Lenny: What did he say?
Carl: I dunno, something about being gay.
"Oh this place smells and something's dripping on me!"
"The smell is manure and the drippings manure! Now turn to Chapter 1 of Math Safari."
"But we're already on Chapter 7."
"Then you'll be teaching WILLIE!"
Hitler, North Dakota?
Favourite/least favourite by seasons that I own (somewhat stolen from Financial Panther):
3 - Dog of Death/When Flanders Failed 4 - Lisa's First Word/So it's Come to This: A Simpsons Clip Show 5 - Secrets of a Successful Marriage/Bart's Inner Child 6 - And Maggie Makes Three/Another Simpsons Clip Show 7 - Marge Be Not Proud/Bart the Fink 8 - Homer's Phobia/The Simpsons Spin-Off Showcase 9 - King of the Hill/Trash of the Titans 10 - Wild Barts Can't Be Broken/Maximum Homerdrive
Homer: There's a question that's crossed out.
Recruiter: Well, due to a recent presidential order, we're not allowed to ask that particular question.
Homer: Oh I think I can make it out. Are you a homosexu-
Recruiter: Oh for God's sake. Don't answer that, i could go to jail
Homer: but I'm not a homo-
Homer: Nice fella. I wonder if he's gay
"Oh, I thought that said brain hemorrhages."
"I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missoura!"
"I've got a better idea...Get the hell out!"
Quimby: C'mon give me the key! These look like teeth marks!
Homer: I thought there was chocolate inside. Well, why was it wrapped in foil?
Quimby: It was never wrapped in foil!
Dr. Hibbert: You have twenty-four hours to live.
Homer: Twenty-four hours!
Dr. Hibbert: Well, twenty-two. I'm sorry I kept you waiting so long.
"Oh I know that story! The year is Nineteen ought six, the president is a young miss Sarah Bernhardt, and all around the country people are doing a dance called The Funky Grandpa! Oh I'm the...falls asleep standing."
Jimbo Jones: [about Homer] I hear that guy's ass has it's own congressman!
Bart Simpson: I wash myself with a rag on a stick.
Homer Simpson: [takes cap out of dryer and puts it on his head] Mmmmm... I CAN feel three types of softness.
Lisa Simpson: [from upstairs] Dad, what are you doing down there?
Homer Simpson: Washing my fat guy's hat honey!
Marge: You're a great father Homie.
Homer: I learned from the master.
Grampa: "Where's Maggie? Where's Maggie? I ain't kidding, my retinas have detached again!"
Marge, Homer, and Apu holding a sandwich laugh.
Apu: "He's blind as a bat!"
They all laugh harder.
Lionel Hutz, Attorney at Law. I'm filing a class action suit against the Director on behalf of everyone who was cut from the play.
I also play Mitch
"We leave you the kids for three hours and the county takes them away?!"
"Oh, bitch, bitch, bitch."
Homer: "Fat Tony was the best boss I ever had!"
Pan out to show Mr. Burns standing beside Homer.
Mr. Burns: "Well...this is awkward."
Patty: Well, if it isn't Wee Willie Wash-out.
Otto: I want to take the test again.
Otto: So I can staple my license to Homer Simpson's big, bald head!
Patty: [interested] Really?
Burns: I want you to do for me, what Spielberg did for Oskar Schindler.
Spielbergo: but Schindler is bueno, Senor Burns el diablo.
Burns: Listen Spielbergo, Schindler and I are like peas in a pod. We're both factory owners, We both made shells for the Nazis, but mine worked damnit. Now go out and win me that festival.
Last edited by Lionel Hutz; 04-05-2012 at 06:52 PM.
^It still amazes me that so many people crap on A Star is Burns due to Jay Sherman, ignoring how hilarious the episode is...
"We did twenty takes, and that was the best one."
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