Quote of the Day Thread

**Semaj** · 10-07-2010, 01:19 PM

"My name is Hans.

Drinking has ruined my life.

I'm 31 years olllld!"

**Jesse Pinkman** · 10-07-2010, 03:22 PM

So what did you think of Blockoland?

It was alright I guess

**Jesse Pinkman** · 10-08-2010, 02:45 AM

"i think i wet my bed"

**Mr Black** · 10-08-2010, 04:35 AM

Freddy Quimby: Thats chowdah! chowdah ! I'll kill you, I'll kill all of you, especially those of you in the jury!

**i'mbatman** · 10-09-2010, 04:51 AM

Carl: And the worst thing is - there's nothing we can do.
Lenny: I think that's the best thing. Coz then we can say - There was nothing we could do.

**Jesse Pinkman** · 10-09-2010, 07:53 AM

you forgot hollywood rule number one: kill homer simpson

**Miss Diko** · 10-09-2010, 09:38 PM

"Oh, hi, Mr. Burns. I'm the worst worker in the world. Time to go home to my mansion and
eat my lobster!" -Grimes

**Dehumanizer** · 10-09-2010, 10:01 PM

"When they put Santa in the ambulance, why did they pull the blanket all the way up over his head?"

**Jesse Pinkman** · 10-10-2010, 04:53 AM

If anyone deserves to take a penny, it's you!

**Mr Black** · 10-10-2010, 05:16 AM

Homer : Son, a woman is a lot like a... [looks around] a refrigerator! They're about six feet tall, 300 pounds. They make ice, and... um... [spots his can of Duff] Oh, wait a minute. Actually, a woman is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! [downs the beer] But you can't stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!

**Comicshow MolemanBob** · 10-10-2010, 09:30 AM

^ Great quote, what episode?

**Mr Black** · 10-10-2010, 10:16 AM

new kid on the block, season 4

**Comicshow MolemanBob** · 10-10-2010, 10:27 AM

Thanks

**Little Nellie Kelly** · 10-10-2010, 02:12 PM

“Did I mention she was dead?” – Homer

“No.” - Lisa

“Well, she was. And she hit him in the head with a golfclub!” – Homer

“And?” – Bart

“Don’t you remember? He went golfing all the time and it really bugged her.” – Homer

“You said he went bowling!” – Lisa

“D'oh!” - Homer

**Christopher the Chef** · 10-11-2010, 12:08 AM

Ned: Reverend... emergency! I... it's the Simpson kids.. eedily.. I, uh, baptism.. oodily.. uh.. doodily doodily!
Lovejoy: Ned... have you thought about one of the other major religions? They're all pretty much the same.

**Jesse Pinkman** · 10-11-2010, 03:04 PM

i caught a white apple!

**Miss Diko** · 10-12-2010, 01:25 AM

"You shoulda thought of that before ya gave me the ol' sugar-me-do!!"

**Jesse Pinkman** · 10-12-2010, 02:48 AM

"coaches coach and players play!"

"so do alligators alligate?"

**Company Picnic** · 10-14-2010, 04:48 AM

Marge: Hmmm... I'll sew that eye back on.
Bart: No! Let's send Burns the eye in the mail. He'll pay more money if he thinks the bear's in danger.
Homer: (as if hypnotized) Yes, we'll send the eye.

**Mr Black** · 10-14-2010, 05:06 AM

Owner: Take this object, but beware it carries a terrible curse!
Homer: [worried] Ooooh, that's bad.
Owner: But it comes with a free Frogurt!
Homer: [relieved] That's good.
Owner: The Frogurt is also cursed.
Homer: [worried] That's bad.
Owner: But you get your choice of topping!
Homer: [relieved] That's good.
Owner: The toppings contains Potassium Benzoate.
Homer: [stares]
Owner: That's bad.

**Uosdwis R. Jewoh** · 10-14-2010, 12:38 PM

This ought to cork her cry hole.

**Dehumanizer** · 10-14-2010, 06:58 PM

"And I'm Alexander Graham Bell, inventor of the telephone."

"You stole it from me, Elisha Gray"

"Read the patent number, bitch!"

**Jesse Pinkman** · 10-15-2010, 04:20 AM

homer: woohoo, underwear dinner!

**Dehumanizer** · 10-15-2010, 08:38 AM

"I wanted to be a children's writer ever since Playboy wouldn't allow my cartoons because they were too filthy!"

**Jesse Pinkman** · 10-18-2010, 03:07 AM

I moved here from Canada and they think I'm slow, eh

**Mr Black** · 10-18-2010, 04:58 AM

one of my favourites-

Marge: You awful man! Stay away from my son.
Bob: Oh, I'll stay away from your son, all right. [evilly] Stay
away...forever!
Homer: [quaking] No!
Bob: Wait a minute, that's no good.
[Starts to walk away, then runs back]
Wait! I've got a good one now. Marge, say, "Stay away from
my son," again.
Marge: [angrily] No!

**i'mbatman** · 10-19-2010, 12:11 AM

Mr Burns: I never liked that Doctor Stupid.

**Christopher the Chef** · 10-19-2010, 04:53 AM

"I like to think that I am a patient, tolerant woman, and that there was no line you could cross that would make me stop loving you.
But last night, you didn't just cross that line, you threw up on it!"

***NormalGamer*** · 10-19-2010, 08:31 PM

Bart: Hey, Lis. A moment of your time.
Lisa: [stops playing her sax] Yeah?
Bart: Suppose I was writing my <second> letter to a girl, and I already
used up my A-material. What should I say?
Lisa: [teasing] Ooooh, could it be there's a special someone you're not
telling me about? [puts down he sax, bats her eyelashes coyly]
Bart: Oh, please.
Lisa: Is it Sherri?
Bart: No.
Lisa: Is it Terri?
Bart: No!
Lisa: Is it that girl with the lazy eyepatch?
Bart: No!
Lisa: Is it that exchange student, M!pa?
Bart: No!! It's <not> for me. It's... homework.
Lisa: Sure it is.
Hey Bart, [teasing, makes goo-goo eyes] let's do some homework!
[puckers up]
Bart: [finally fed up, pushes Lisa aside]
-- ``Bart the Lover''

**Christopher the Chef** · 10-20-2010, 11:31 PM

Robber: Hey, you're James Woods!
Woods: Oh thank you, yes, thank you.
Robber: Well, Mr. Woods, your new song is going to be number three with a bullet!
Woods: I.. I'm not a singer.
Robber: Shut up!

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