"You've been rubbing my nose in it since I got here! Your family is better than my family, your beer comes from farther away than my beer, you and your son like each other, and your wife's butt is higher than my wife's butt! You make me sick!"
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"Some people say I look like Dan Aykroyd." -- Homer Simpson.
"Oh, I'm seeing stars here."
"I'm seeing double here... four Krusties!"
"It's an honor to give $10,000. Especially now, when the rich mosaic of cable programming has made public television very, very unnecessary."
"You're my rose; will you let me be your thorn?"
Marge: Doesn't the Bible say, "Whatsoever you do to the least of my brothers, that you do unto me"?
Homer: Yes, but doesn't the Bible also say "Thou shalt not take... moochers into thy... hut"?
"You hit her pretty hard there, Rick!"
Look at me! I'm a scientist!
Zep's top five:
1. Bart's Inner Child
2. Bart Carny
3. Burns, Baby Burns
4. Bart v. Australia
5. Bart's Comet
(Yes, I like Bart episodes...who told you?)
"For no reason, here's Apu."
"What's wrong with this country? Can't a man walk down the street without being offered a job?"
"Roman Numerals? They never even tried to teach us that in school!"
"Mr. Smithers! Mr. Smithers! That moose is on fire!"
"I can't believe she went home with those guys"
Ms. Krabappel: All right, class, take one and pass the rest back. [hands out exams]
Bart: [to himself] Think, Simpson, think. Crisis brings out the best in you.
[convulses and collapses on the floor, moaning]
Ms. Krabappel: Ugh. What is it, Bart.
Bart: [climbing back to his seat] Nothing... Must... take... test...
[falls back to the floor]
"Was all that real? Or was it some wonderful dream?"
"IT'S IN REVELATIONS, PEOPLE!"
Look at me! I'm the Prime Minister of Ireland!
"Well, he’s kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace “accidentally” with “repeatedly” and replace “dog” with “son.”"
"You'll release the dogs, or the bees, or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you?"
"Wow. I've never been referred to as an adult before. I've been tried as one."
Yeah, well, you know, that's just like, uh, your opinion, man.
"We work hard. We play hard."
"What a shame, that car was one day away from retirement."
DID THAT BUTTER CHURN JUST MOVE?
'Cause if it did.....
"Who robs cavefish of their sight? Who rigs every Oscar night? We do, we do!"
What's that expression I'm looking for... uh... yeah!
"That's nothing, he can hear pudding."
Moe: I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt, my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt!
"Howdy gangstas! I'm average American Joe Salaryman waiter."
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