Quote of the Day Thread

**Simpsons Forever!** · 09-15-2005, 02:30 AM

Brandine: "Cletus, if I find lipstick on your collar again, I'm not gonna let you sleep in the sty no more."
-The Dad Who Knew Too Little

**Talking Pie** · 09-15-2005, 07:55 AM

Bart Sells His Soul

Bart: Well, if your soul is real, where is it?
Milhouse: [motions to his chest] It's kind of in here. And when you
sneeze, that's your soul trying to escape. Saying "God bless
you" crams it back in! [gestures up his nose] And when you
die, it squirms out and flies away.
Bart: Uh huh. What if you die in a submarine at the bottom of the
ocean?
Milhouse: Oh, it can swim. It's even got wheels in case you die in the
desert and it has to drive to the cemetery.

**Jayrayman** · 09-15-2005, 09:29 AM

Homer : "Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos"

**Commander McCool** · 09-15-2005, 07:25 PM

Originally Posted by Simpsons Forever!

Brandine: "Cletus, if I find lipstick on your collar again, I'm not gonna let you sleep in the sty no more."
-The Dad Who Knew Too Little

Cletus: Duly noted.

**Simpsons Forever!** · 09-15-2005, 11:58 PM

Barfly: "What've you got riding on this game?
Homer: "My daughter.
Barfly: {whistles} What a gambler!"
-Lisa The Greek

**Wavy Gravy** · 09-16-2005, 04:34 AM

"These bloody things are everywhere! They're in the lift, in the lorry, in the bongwhizzer, and all over the melongagoolachuck!"
-- Australian store owner, "Bart Vs. Australia"

**Semaj** · 09-16-2005, 06:16 AM

Marge: "Homer, there's someone here who can help you."
Homer: "Is it Batman?"
Marge: "No, it's a scientist."
Homer: "Batman's a scientist."
Marge: "IT'S NOT BATMAN!"

**Terrier Williger** · 09-16-2005, 09:37 AM

"Could this record-breaking heat wave be the result of the dreaded `Greenhouse Effect' ? Well, if 70-degree days in the middle of winter are the price of car pollution, you'll forgive me if I keep my old Pontiac." - Kent Brockman

**Mira** · 09-16-2005, 07:39 PM

"Oooh Dear me, one day as a brunette. I feel so bad for you."

**jwbph** · 09-16-2005, 07:45 PM

Our topic day: Is there too much violence in children's cartoons? Most people would say, of course not, what kind of stupid question is that?

**Cyclone** · 09-16-2005, 10:01 PM

Lisa:Thanks Dad
Homer:I don't think,I just act.
"Last Tap Dance in Springfield"

**Radioactive Man** · 09-17-2005, 12:04 AM

Back, you robots! Nobody ruins my family vacation but me...and maybe the boy!

**Simpsons Forever!** · 09-17-2005, 12:13 AM

"I'm just happy you're excited about something besides saving the whales. Face it, they're doomed."
-Marge, I'm Spelling As Fast As I Can

Dr. Bartley · 09-17-2005, 08:39 PM

Lisa: You, sir, are a baboon!
Homer: [gasp] Me?
Lisa: Yes, you! Baboon! Baboon! Baboon! Baboon!
Homer: I don't think you realize what you're saying...
Lisa: BABOON! [leaves in tears]
Bart: Whoa. Somebody was bound to say it someday, I just can't believe it was her.

**Talking Pie** · 09-17-2005, 10:15 PM

Mayored To The Mob

Leavelle: Okay, listen up. My goal is to assassinate that watermelon.
Your job is to take the bullet. Go! [Homer runs] Go, go,
go!
[imitating gun] Pow!
Homer: [diving in front of the cross-hairs] Nooo ...
Leavelle: Well, your dive wasn't bad, but I just didn't believe your
"Noooooooo!!". You gotta sell it! Remember, your
"Noooooooo!!" is what gets you your next job. Now drop and
give me twenty!
Homer: Noooooooo!!
Leavelle: Better!

**Gatorgod** · 09-17-2005, 10:58 PM

Did-you-see-those-Drapes! *robotic laughter* Ha-Ha-Ha!

**Thats A Paddlin** · 09-18-2005, 04:42 AM

"this town is as useless as that...lemon shaped rock over there......wait a minit! THERS A LEMON BEHIND THAT ROCK!!!"

**Thats A Paddlin** · 09-18-2005, 08:20 AM

Bart Reading:

"Dont Do What Donny Dont Does........ugh they cudda made this simpler"

**Simpsons Forever!** · 09-18-2005, 08:40 AM

Lisa: "...and any time I hear the wind blow, it will whisper the name: Edna.
Marge: That's very good, Lisa!
Homer: P.S. I am gay."
-Bart The Lover

**Radioactive Man** · 09-18-2005, 05:19 PM

Damn FDA! Why can't it all be marshmallows?

**Upgrayedd** · 09-18-2005, 08:01 PM

Homer-Okay, Marge. But don't be surprised if a snuggle monster shows up.
Marge-Well, I hope he's accompanied by the "how was your day" monster and the "foot rub" monster and the "Let me just...."
Homer-Don't worry, he won't show up.

Dr. Bartley · 09-19-2005, 01:18 AM

Bart: [Daniel Stern's voice, a la Wonder Years] Me? Get a job? Were they serious? I didn't realize it at the time, but a little piece of my childhood had slipped away, forever.
Homer: Bart! What are you staring at?
Bart: Uh, nothing. [Daniel Stern continues] He didn't say it, and neither did I, but at that moment, my dad and I were closer than we...
Homer: Bart! Stop it!
Bart: Sorry.

**Cyclone** · 09-20-2005, 10:48 AM

Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him. - Homer

**Thats A Paddlin** · 09-20-2005, 12:33 PM

Homer: why is he so anxious to go to the garage?
Moe: "garage" hey fellas! the "garage" well o-la-la Mr. French man
Homer: whudya call yours?
Moe: a car-hole

**SSBOB** · 09-20-2005, 12:34 PM

"Uhh, we object to the term 'urine soaked hell-hole' when you could have said 'peepee soaked heck-hole'"

**Haoie** · 09-20-2005, 09:44 PM

From Who Shot Mr Burns part 2:

Dream Lisa: Don't eat the clues!!

**Simpsons Forever!** · 09-21-2005, 12:26 AM

"Lisa, when you've sustained as many blows to the head as I have, consistency is something something that something I love you Baaart."
-Homer, The Girl Who Slept Too Little

**JSGI** · 09-21-2005, 08:49 PM

Marge : This is terrible! How will the kids get home?

Homer : I'unno, internet?

**Thats A Paddlin** · 09-22-2005, 02:15 PM

"But marge if you become a cop thatll make you the man, which will make me the woman! and i have interest in that, besides occaionally wearing the underwear, which, as we discussed, is stictly a comfort thing"

**Rembrant Q Einstein** · 09-22-2005, 02:24 PM

Canadian National Guard: Take a hike you shatner stealing mexico touchers!

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