Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 80



Thread: ketchup sucks cock (fuck ketchup)



(Users Browsing this Thread: )

  1. #1


    ketchup sucks cock (fuck ketchup)

    seriously, fucking horrible with almost everything. how the fuck do you people eat this shit? it's disgusting.

    please attempt to justify to me why ketchup is good.

  2. #2
    catchin' some gnarly pounders comeau's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    East Coast
    Posts
    1,460


    Do you eat Heinz ketchup? If your answer is no, then there is your issue. Heinz ketchup or bust.


  3. #3
    I'm a real user of women hutz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    a barren wasteland of soul crushing loneliness a.k.a. hamm
    Posts
    9,515


    is your ketchup not kept in the fridge?
    if so, there's your other problem


  4. #4
    Let Kenny Stay! Sweet_Potatoes's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    Pennsylvania
    Posts
    2,522


    I actually prefer mustard, vinegar, or nothing at all, but when I do eat it, I guess I like that it adds more flavor. I also agree with the other two posters, eating Heinz ketchup and not putting in the refrigerator is the best way to go.

  5. #5
    pineapple shoes Dark Meat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Posts
    17,954
    Blog Entries
    10


    The tomato is a critical element of the history of culinary civilization, and ketchup is the most nearly perfect of all the tomato’s manifestations, thus it is the only true culinary expression of the melting pot. Heinz's Tomato Ketchup is specifically calibrated to hit all of the fundamental tastes in the human palate's sensory spectrum - salty, sweet, sour, bitter, and umami - all at once, and is the only condiment to do so. Trained testers at the sensory-analysis center at Kansas State University have judged the individual elements of said ketchup to be well blended and more sensorially complete than other brands.


  6. #6
    Professional Burger Stealer Krusty Burglar's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    5,587
    Blog Entries
    2


    I like ketchup only on burgers. Hate it everywhere else.

  7. #7
    might do something not nice Jims's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    6,137
    Blog Entries
    3


    What? No way. Ketchup completely redeems the tomato, which is The Most Overrated Fruit of All Time.

    Also, mustard sucks way more.


  8. #8
    there are no accidents HANDSOME.S4.COMPLETE.XviD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 1989
    Location
    pennsylvania
    Posts
    24,115
    Blog Entries
    343


    ketchup is amazing. its ever-so-slight salty-tomato-y taste lends itself to tasting great with almost anything. but not hot dogs. only mustard with hot dogs. burgers, fries, etc. are for ketchup.
    Quote Originally Posted by ofhf View Post
    I was always a pointless guy
    Its a little known fact that Freddy is actually a huge fan of David Letterman. The Fresh Prince upset Freddy when he turned Letterman off, and his punishment is death.

  9. #9
    beautiful tomorrow Ryan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Las Vegas, NV
    Posts
    19,845


    Quote Originally Posted by Jims View Post
    What? No way. Ketchup completely redeems the tomato, which is The Most Overrated Fruit of All Time.

    Also, mustard sucks way more.
    I guess if we ever do another terrible opinions episode in the future, condiments are off the table because I 100% agree with that.

  10. #10
    gotta have it mutilated_lips's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Water Valley, MS
    Posts
    6,486
    Blog Entries
    14


    at least until the inevitable intense mayonnaise debate
    Quote Originally Posted by Xaiv View Post
    If semen tasted like cookie dough ice cream, I would suck so much dick.
    Quote Originally Posted by Judge Fudge View Post
    August 12th.
    Cleopatra committed suicide on this date. That's pretty cool.
    Quote Originally Posted by ThaSimpsonz View Post
    and also, a black man who raped white women, c'mon that's just way too juicy of a story, I just don't buy it.

  11. Thumbs Up To This Post by: hutz

  12. #11
    there are no accidents HANDSOME.S4.COMPLETE.XviD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 1989
    Location
    pennsylvania
    Posts
    24,115
    Blog Entries
    343


    jims v. ryan 'can mayonnaise be legally called an instrument?'

  13. #12
    White Whine #Halloween's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    South England
    Posts
    3,940
    Blog Entries
    5


    Ketchup is horrible

































    in large amounts. Hooray for ketchup though; it makes boring foods less boring, and I would rate it up there with salt.
    Furry ally because wat tha fuck evar.

  14. #13
    what hamm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    10,129
    Blog Entries
    24


    ketchup is the best
    mayo is the worst

  15. #14
    gotta have it mutilated_lips's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Water Valley, MS
    Posts
    6,486
    Blog Entries
    14


    actually, malt vinegar is the best condiment

    ketchup is a competent second place

  16. #15
    .gif Shaunbadia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Northern Ireland
    Posts
    20,776
    Blog Entries
    1


    I very much like ketchup.
    Fun Fact: I hate heights

  17. #16
    White Whine #Halloween's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    South England
    Posts
    3,940
    Blog Entries
    5


    @hammster What if I told you... ketchup and mayo are lush together? Oh and that garlic mayo...

  18. #17
    what hamm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    10,129
    Blog Entries
    24


    Quote Originally Posted by Yule Blog View Post
    @hammster What if I told you... ketchup and mayo are lush together? Oh and that garlic mayo...
    mayo legit makes me throw up (think i'm allergic) so i don't wanna try that and ruin ketchup for myself

  19. #18
    White Whine #Halloween's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    South England
    Posts
    3,940
    Blog Entries
    5


    Then you are excused.

    But I have to ask, because this is important: does your family keep mayo in the fridge? It must be in the fridge or it will definitely make you throw up.

  20. #19
    (annoyed-grunt) Elliot74's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Location
    England
    Posts
    3,604


    Ketchup is extremely overrated, it's really mediocre
    Mayo on the other hand is god's greatest gift to mankind
    "Maybe there is no moral. Maybe its just a bunch of stuff that happened."
    - The Simpsons

  21. #20
    Stonecutter Simpsons_Sweden's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    Stockholm, Sweden
    Posts
    3,770
    Blog Entries
    1


    I don't like ketchup either.

    Fuck Ketchup!

  22. #21
    really CousinMerl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Spittle County
    Posts
    5,493


    Quote Originally Posted by Jims View Post
    What? No way. Ketchup completely redeems the tomato, which is The Most Overrated Fruit of All Time.
    Isn't the tomato a vegetable?

    And I do think ketchup should be stored in the fridge; while I haven't tried it out myself, I'm sure warm or tepid ketchup isn't the best.

  23. #22
    Stonecutter Simpsons_Sweden's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    Stockholm, Sweden
    Posts
    3,770
    Blog Entries
    1


    Quote Originally Posted by CousinMerl View Post
    Isn't the tomato a vegetable?
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tomato

    No it's a fruit/berry.

  24. #23
    what hamm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    10,129
    Blog Entries
    24


    Quote Originally Posted by Yule Blog View Post
    Then you are excused.

    But I have to ask, because this is important: does your family keep mayo in the fridge? It must be in the fridge or it will definitely make you throw up.
    We don't have Mayo often but if we do, yes.

  25. #24
    what hamm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    10,129
    Blog Entries
    24


    Quote Originally Posted by CousinMerl View Post
    Isn't the tomato a vegetable?
    That's like "fun" facts 101, Merl.

  26. #25
    White Whine #Halloween's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    South England
    Posts
    3,940
    Blog Entries
    5


    Quote Originally Posted by CousinMerl View Post
    I do think ketchup should be stored in the fridge; while I haven't tried it out myself, I'm sure warm or tepid ketchup isn't the best.
    Yeah, it's weird because it gets warmed up when you put it on hot food, but I absolutely prefer it to be originally cold. Something about it being able to get heated up while sitting out or in a cupboard is so gross to me.

  27. #26
    what hamm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    10,129
    Blog Entries
    24


    Room temperature ketchup is perfection. Despise cold condiments on my warm food.


  28. #27
    Abhorsen-in-Waiting kupomog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    Mililani, HI
    Posts
    32,571


    Quote Originally Posted by Kaos View Post
    actually, malt vinegar is the best condiment
    Yes


    I like most condiments. Ketchup is used often but not to an overpowering amount. A few times, it has actually saved some horribly bland chili I have been forced to eat.
    I like mustard NOW (hated it as a kid), but stone ground or sweet hot mustard is better than yellow. I'm a-ok with mayo and its many uses, and have even grown to tolerate tartar sauce.

  29. #28
    scaleless bologna sandwich Steve's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    13,264
    Blog Entries
    3


    Had burgers and fries from Five Guys the other day and got 3 ketchup containers to go with it Fresh, room temperature Heinz goes so well with their fries. Ahghghghghghgh

  30. #29
    gotta have it mutilated_lips's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Water Valley, MS
    Posts
    6,486
    Blog Entries
    14


    oh no wait, ketchup is third place

    cocktail sauce is second place

  31. #30
    Food-Crazed Maniac Oh, that's raspberry!'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Pennsylvania
    Posts
    15,014
    Blog Entries
    41


    Ketchup is the only condiment I'll even eat, I have to fight the urge not to use the whole bottle in one sitting. I'll eat any brand really, Heinz or Hunts or generic, whatever, I prefer it cold but doesn't need to be.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

User Tag List

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •