Thano : Bake 'em away, toys.
Eric : What did you just say?
Michael : I dunno, something about being gay.

Thano : Are you a man or a woman, because... ahh hell it doesn't matter. You can come over, we'll play scrabble.
Michael : Thano is taking the loss of his girlfriend very well.
Thano : *cries*

i think either you're a bunch of bitter 80 year-old guys (or 16 year-old ugly nerds that couldn't get a date if their life depended on it and are gonna grow up to look like cletus) who play nintendo all day and think they're cool. i'm guessing you all like wrestling and wish you were pimps. okay guys, questions: 1. when was the last time you got off the internet and made contact with *real* people? and 2. what kind of name is "thano"? - sugar-chick

Thano : Heh, it's funny cause I'm making money answering you, and you spent your time insulting us... you probably visit the site every day too... freak. I have an idea? How about I exploit your e-mail address? Yeah! Ok people, send all hate mail to sweetstrawberrykiwi@alloymail.com. Weeeeeee!
Michael : And I also think it's funny, 'cause I have a girlfriend, unlike Thano.
Crowd : Oooooooh!
Thano : That was a low blow. *throws a grenade into the audience*
Crowd : You suck, Thano! Boooo!

Well, first you wake up at about 10:30 am, then you turn your t.v on to fox. You drill a huge hole in the screen then climb inside. You walk through Shelbyville until you make your way past the lemon tree and into Springfield. You spend 5 hours walking around and find out whats happening. Then you walk back past the lemon tree, through shelbyville and back out the screen. Then, you turn on your computer and tell the world what is happening in Springfield. - Ryan "Um dad, were supposed to be at the newspaper" Burrows

Thano : He's discovered our secrets! Quick, get the tranquilizers.
AJ : Okay, last time I am going to say this. Do not pass the bong to that guy ever again.

Thano : Stop eating our purple berries! *snags them away* Mmmm... *eats a few, froths at the mouth* That's some ggoooooooooooooood ca;clkjs;ga iogewn[aoiengv[waoi *faints*
Michael : We gotta stop buying him those.

I think working at ET is piss-easy. All you do is steal away other peoples pictures and post them on your site, whilst I steal away other peoples pictures and... ummm... hey look! Lee's wearing puffy purple pants! - Graham Dawson

Thano : *on the ground, passed out* I wear puffy pants, and when I was little the boys used to...
Eric : *clubs Thano over the head*

Working here is a paradise!! You get lots og good things, like anal probes and al the guys you want. I would like some money though. I must go now, I'm drawing a picture of Mr. Burns nude....*drooling* See Ya later, Alligator!! See ya - Lee

Thano : Eric, Lee's starting to scare me.
Eric : We'll stick him in the basement for two months of isolation therapy.
Michael : Won't Russ eat him though?
Russ : Too late.
Eric : Dammit, Russ. You didn't even finish your fish heads.

It seems to me that "Evergreen Terrace" is really nothing more than a shanty located in some local landfill ("Solid Waste - I could kiss you! Mwah! Ugh... Mwah! Eeewww... Mwah! I think this was pizza...") stocked with discarded furniture and electronic equipment. The shanty has been invaded by some sort of gigantic Space Ants. By day, the "Evergreen Terrace" employees toil in the insect overlords' sugar mines, and by night they retire to the shanty to play with their garbage-infested computer equipment, including a large (15 gigabyte) pastrami hoagie for a hard drive. When something malfunctions, Thano at first becomes irate, but can then be heard to say, "Aw, sandwich... I could never stay mad at you. Eric, I'd like to be alone with the sandwich." "Are you going to eat it?" "Yes." After firing up their computers, attempting to update their site but finding themselves unable to do so because there are wavy potato chips and junkyard ants shorting out the circuits, they say "Screw it! Let's watch some porn!" and flip on "Men Alone 2 - The KY Connection" for hours of entertainment before heading to bed to rest up for another day of sugar mining and porn watching. Yes this sucked because all I did was use snippets of other episodes (and the movie Clerks, I suppose), but I'm an unoriginal bastard. What can I say? I guess I can sum up by saying, "Can I have a job there too?" My current job has been overthrown and... replaced. By the benevolent General Krull. All Hail Krull. Sincerely, Little Girl. - Dan "Hail Ants" Parker

Thano : Ok, you can get a job here. You're hired! Now you're fired! AHAHAHAH! I can feel the power! I can feel it coursing through me! I hold all the...
Eric : Get back to work.
Thano : Yes, sir.

Oh man, the sick responses I could but for this question, but ya know what? I'll be normal and say that everyday, you get up around noon, have some Cap'n Crunch, hop on the computer, check your mail, talk to some people through ICQ and whatnot, then work on something for Evergreen Terrance, then around 6, you go to a type of fast food joint (Unless you're Lee, then you go to a gay bar) then you return home to watch a nice syndicated episode of The Simpsons (Unless your Thano, then you try to get some illigal channel. Or Eric, who watches MTV, just waiting for a Backstret Boys video to come on, heh.)Then you go to bed around nine, but not before you read a nice educational book *cough*porno-mag*cough* See, a nice almost non-perverted response. - Maddie C.

Thano : It was a solid attempt. You get an "E" for effort.
Michael : And I give you an "A" for absolutely pitiful.

The Monday-Friday events: 0:00 Try to sleep. 0:15 " " " again. 0:30 Think about dreaming about thinking. 1:30 Take sleeping pills. 1:31:00 Fall asleep. 1:31:10 Wake up. 1:31:11-5:29 Wonder why sleeping pills didn't work. 5:30 Get bored of thinking. Fall asleep. 5:31 Wake up. 5:32-5:40 Wonder why sleep didn't work. 6:00 Fall asleep. 14:00 Wake up. 14:05 Take shower. Do "repeat" step until bottle is empty. Get another. 14:30 Update ET. 15:00 Write 500-word food essay on chicken pounded flat. Then eat it. 16:00 Eat purple with some donuts. 17:00 Wait. 17:30 Keep waiting. 18:00 Wait some more. 18:28 Turn on TV. 18:29 Wait some more. 18:30-19:30 Watch The Simpsons. 20:00:00-20:00:02 Eat, drink, go to Hawaii, return, eat, drink, do something. 23:58 Update ET. 23:59 Go to bed. - Alexander Hill

Thano : What's this crazy 24 hour clock business! I'm so confused! AHHH!
Michael : Thano think of all the sleeping and waiting as hitting on women.
Thano : Eric you have to stop the supply of crack to the ET workers, Michael tried to say something, but it didn't make sense!
Eric : Nah, he's fine. This is what we call "Sober Michael."

It all starts in the morning, where you wake from your beds made out of piles of money. You try not to disturb the many beautiful ladies with you as you get up to get to your computers. Of course, only suckers use their legs so you hire a British butler called Jeeves to carry you there. You finally arrive at your PIII 1 Ghz computer with T4 connection to the internet, and a 50 inch monitor. You sit down in a huge throne surrounded by more beautiful ladies, who fan you with big leaves and feed you grapes. Then you get Jeeves to type what you say; why whould you do the work? After Jeeves writes the latest news, you check the time. 10 am. Your work is done here. You get out of your throne and press a button on a remote control device, which causes the wall to open and reveal a huge room with a laser sticking out of the roof. You get to the laser and punch in a bunch of different commands. You ask your myriads of servants which country they like least; Italy or France. They all say 'France' at the same time. So you set the co-ordinates for France. Suddenly, the door explodes and thousands of soldiers come pouring in, firing bullets everywhere. You summon your guards to attack them. A large bloody battle ensues, filled with lots of explosions and violence. You blow up France, in the meanwhile, and then after all the soldiers have died use your power to seize the east coast. As the day wears on, you get bored, so you decide to kill all the fox attornies in horrible ways. Much hilarity ensues. But you see that one lawyer got away, so you release all your flying winged monkeys to get him. They all fall down and die. Then the lawyer trips on a rock and gets run over by a car. After that, you go back to yor throne to see if there were any more submissions for 'Just D'oh it'. It turns out that someone, writing in all caps, wrote a response to #1. So you hire a spanish assassin to kill him. You all have a good laugh, until McBain comes out of a nearby ice sculpture with a huge gun in his hands. You kick him in his shins and knee him in the face. McBain recovers quickly and breaks your legs. Then you offer him a grape. He takes the grape, but unknown to him the grape was posioned and McBain collapses. Then you laugh evilly, and make your servants have dirty lesbian sex. Really dirty. VERY dirty. Dirty to the point of sickening. Then you go to bed and do the very same thing the next day. Vote Quimby. - David "Stop him, he's supposed to die!" Couture

Thano : The best part was the lesbian sex.
Michael : Thano likes his lesbian sex dirty.

Well, you probably sit around in your _air conditioning_, in front of your _computers_, doing nothing! In my day, we didn't HAVE air conditioners. We had to go to the North Pole to keep cool. Did I ever tell you about the time I met Peary? He was quite a guy...and quite the ladies' man! And as for your "computers", in my day we had to use an abacus! And use PEN AND PAPER to send messages to each other! But you don't know what that is, now do you? And as for this type of thing, why, it was impossible! And it's kind of pointless, too...especially if it's never updated! I've been waiting for MONTHS for a new "Just D'oh It", and do you think it's here yet? NOOO!! OF COURSE NOOT!! THAT would be too HAARD for your POOOR little lazy pantywaists, now wouldn't it? A- hey, did this thing update las month? Oh, well, that's my answer to this one, then. Well, I'm an old man. I don't pay attention to anything but Matlock-ooh! It's on now! - Grampa Abraham Simpson, the King of Ranters

Thano : Matlock holds the answers to all of life's problems.

I think that you are all secretly a hit rock band that goes by the name of, let's say "Limp Bizkit". After Lee takes advantage of all your young male fans, the rest of you retire back to your mansions and eat your lobster and have sex with tons of beautiful girls. And Eric is your manager, agent, and drug dealer- keeper awayer. And um.... THANO RULES!!!!!! - Steve

Thano : Heh, I do kinda rule, don't I?
Michael : Thano, Thano, look! He's kissing your ass!
Thano : So he is... I see nothing wrong with that. Carry on.

Lets get serious for the moment... people don't really know how much work has to be done everyday to catch up latest news, add lots of new content to site. It takes hours everyday to make a decent update for every site including ET. I say with a updates like this site Eric must be quittted his studying to update ET all day :) - Jukka Keskiaho

Thano : Pffft... seriousness? Who needs that!? Quick Eric, think of a wacky response.
Eric : Too much pressure! Thano... uh, do a dance.
Michael : I know what to do! *Throws a gazelle at Thano*
Thano : Oww, what the hell was that for?
Michael : Awnno.

well i imagine you guys are mostly canadian, cuz americans aren't usually this funny, so from what i remember about canada, you guys probably sit around drinking good tasting beer and watching "Deep Space Homer" over and over. and there's probably hot women and universal healthcare lurking around the terrace as well. and lots of new york fries. new york fries f**kin rocks! ooh and some chippendales dancers in thano's room. now why did i say the dancers were in thano's room? lee's the one with the light loafers! damn, drinking lysol screws up your memory. i promise never to make the mistake again. (promise void in 49 states.) yours truly, the midget splicer. - bonzar the hunted

Thano : Most of that would be correct. Except for the Chippendales dancers...
Chippendales Dancer : Did anyone order a group of us?
Thano : Uhh... ask Eric. *runs away*

Nothing wrong with ET. Didn't you hear me? THERE IS NOTHING WRONG AT ALL WITH EVERGREEN TERRACE!!!! - Alexander (Mr. Violent) Gustafsson

Eric : You guys stay here while I try to talk some sense into this insane man.

Typical Weekday 8:00-Eric smokes pot 9:00-Eric smokes crack 10:00-Eric watches a crappy episode like "Days of Wine and D'oh'ses" and laughs because he is high. 11:00-It is still hours until the subsidary owners come to ET because they go to school unlike Eric 12:00-The gang eats lunch at their schools while Eric goest to a dumpster near his house and gets a burrito. 1:00-Eric spends this hour puking from the burrito everyone else is still in school 2:00-3:00:Everone is know home and works on their subsidaries 4:00-Eric falls asleep after a long day of nothing 5:00-12:00-The subsidiary owners do a bunch of work in Eric's name, the next day Eric wakes up and is surprised when he sees all the work he did on the site. And so ends another day for ET - Rowdy Harmon

Eric : A burrito? I wish... but remember, kids, discarded pizza boxes are an inexpensive source of cheese.
Michael : Eric doesnt like "burritos," he likes "tacos." Thank you, I'll be here all night!

You sit around all day reading these and comeing up with humourous, yet *adorable*, comments while talking to your therapists to get over the trama of having to peer into these sick freaks twisted psyche. This must take forever....How do you manage it? Wait a minute....YOU'RE ORANGE NAZIS AREN'T YA?!? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE YOU ORANGE PANIZES!!!!!!!!!!! - RavishinglyRood

Thano : There aren't any Nazi's around here...
Hitler : Hi.
Thano : Get back into your box, freak.
Hitler : Okay.
Thano : *rolls box down a flight of stairs* Hee hee! Stupid Nazis.
Hitler : Gosh, I'z juzt vanted to have friendly chat wit Thano here.

The day starts out with a cool, refreshing cup of iced mocha java (Or, in Thano's case, a bottle of vodka). Suddenly, a shot rings out! What is there to do? A glance to the left reveals Lee quivered behind Thano (Let's hope he's just hiding). A look to the left finds Eric sitting on his throne of the Simpsons community miles away. Panic strikes inside. What is there to do? Where to run for help? And then he appears. Out of the darkness comes someone who you can't make out. He walks closer. You yell to him, but he neither slows down nor hastens his pace. When he finally arrives, he grabs you by your shoulder and pulls you up. What does he want? Who is he? You get the courage to finally ask the latter question and he replies with one simple word: Russ. Do you smile? Do you cry? Only tomorrow will tell. To be continued...... - Aaron Brown

Thano : Speaking of Russ, I haven't fed him for a week. Ahh well.
Russ : Soooo hunnngrrryyyy...
Thano : Shut up and get back into your box. *rolls box down a flight of stairs* Ahh, that'll never get old.

Well, I would figure that after the strippers come in for their daily breast inspection at the hands of the ET staff, it's off to the bar at 10:30AM to get nice and liquored up. Where do you think the money from IGN's sponsorship goes? Anyways, after very enthralling and exciting games of beer pong and Asshole, the ET staff leaves at 3PM to go start working on the site. Not for long, however, as the Duff Beer Man comes in at 4:30, and ruins any attempts at work. As we all know, people who are already drunk can't resist more alcohol! On the off chance that the Beer Man and his crew leave before 9, the staff sets in to do some serious work. However, they're usually intoxicated beyond belief and cannot even say the word "titmouse" without giggling like schoolgirls. Hee hee hee hee! They figure it's time to quit while they're ahead, and turn in for the night. (That is, if they haven't passed out already.) And kudos to them, for they are keeping our strippers breast-cancer-free and entertaining us with these wonderful questions! What happened to my hands? Uhh... (Boating accident.) I believe it was a boking accident. *gun cocks* I have to go now! - Ed Ruane

Thano : To be completely honest with you, IGN funding goes to many needy charities. *evil grin*
Eric : Actually, Thano, we've searched every inch of your room and all we found was porno, porno, porno!
Michael : That's my room, Eric. Oops, I did it again!

Life here at ET is wonderful. The crew gathers around the breakfast table for their daily tea and crumpets, while the Erics (I don't know how many there are so many...so so many erics...ok, fine there are 2) dance their jig in the corner to Backstreet Boy's music. Russ gets cozy by the blaze set in the 2 trash cans. Bob and Ed discuss their Star Wars movie memorphelia, while Thano cuts of the heads of Britney Spears pictures and glues them to pictures of naked women. Soon, one of them figures out, usually Eric W, that they have work to do. The group scatters and goes to do their job. During lunch, they meet again and warm up some eggs on the trash can fire. Russ usually takes everything and so the rest of them have to eat baked peas and crusty oranges. After their yummy lunch, they look at Thano's Britney Spears pictures and evaluate his magnificent work. Bob steals them. After all of this, they go back to work. Around 2 o'clock, Ed screams for Thano because his eyes have crusted up, again...(Too much computer time, you see). Eric W. gives Ed his special eye drops. The eye drops make Ed's eyes turn yellow and everyone runs away from him for the rest of the day. At 3:30, work's over and everyone goes home. They go to their parents' houses and eat some decent food. Later, they all go online and "cruise" the net. Instead of having some fun, they do some more work. And so, the ET crew's life revolves mostly around work. We all pity them but greatly appreciate their wonderful work. (P.S. This was meant for comical purposes... I do not mean to offend any of the ET crew, but hey, if the truth hurts, deal with it. buahahah. Don't sue.) - Maria S.

Thano : My latest creations are Christina Aguilera's head on Britney's body, and Britney's head on Christina's body! GENIUS! PURE GENIUS!
Michael : Let me see. *looks at his creations* Damn, that's nice.

It would be so cool! You're like POW POW POW and everyone else is like AAAAAAGGGHHH *crash* and then you have pancakes to celebrate and then you're like mngnmbmnph mnhoghmn - sniping_people

Thano : Hahahhahahaha... I don't know why that's so funny but it is!
Michael : That's what I hear Thano doing in the bathroom when he thinks no one is around.

Oh, Lee, I`m so proud of you, making you`re own web site like this, and by the way, you left your Play Girl Magazines at home, the ones you read for the articles? And I`m sending you fresh socks, underwear and some cookies, you can never have enough socks. And everyone else, stop making fun of my baby boy! Don`t worry, Leela - yes, that`s what I call my precious baby, Leela, it`s so *cute!* - mommy will protect you! Have fun with your little web site and certainly have fun with your friends, Leela - mommy needs to make sure you`re doing all right and that you`re hving a lot of fun, oh I miss you! Call me! - Lee`s mother

Eric : Well, Lee will be pretty pissed if we leave this reply up, so will someone delete this submission before we upload the page?
Thano : Check. *falls asleep*

You're probably all a bunch of fat, sweaty nerds who spend more time writing pointless, overanalytical "episode capsules" than actually talking to real people. I suspect your average age is 16 and you don't actually go to work ... you just FTP pages in from your Dad's computer in between searching for fake nudes of Katie Holmes. - Rex Banner

Thano : *looks up from his pile of money* Did you say something?

"What do I think you do all day"? Hmm... thats tough. Well, I think all you guys do is sit around eating donuts, drinking coffee, and being abnormally fat. Instead of YOU doing the work, you hired the Civil War Reinactment Monkeys to type out endless strings of HTML and CGI. You're probably holding a gun to The Comic Book Store Guy's head if he doesnt type up stuff for you and search for new Simpsons news on the net. And, to ensure that your flowers (which you most likely keep in a windowsill) dont wilt and/or die, you've got Groundskeeper Willy gardening and tending them! YOU SICKOS!!!!!!!!!! FREE MOE FROM YOUR UNDERGROUND PRISON!!!!!!!! - Jengi Sythic

Thano : Never.

Razor: What's up, guys? We're here to answer your question and win that prize, although since there are two of us, you can just send it to me. Ruudboy: Hey, that's not fair, man! Razor: Okay then, how about we flip a coin to decide who gets to keep the prize? Heads, I win, tails, you lose. Ruudboy: Now that's more like it. But how do you know we'll even win? I thought you hadda come up with a really, really good answer before they'd consider posting it. Razor: Dude, have you even read this section before? I don't think it takes much dedication or brain power to win these things, which in our case is fortunate, since we're severely lacking in both areas. Anyway, the answer we came up with is that we think you guys do a good job on this website. So good, in fact, that there's no way you can possibly have lives outside of the Internet, because you're always online, no matter what time of day or night. Ruudboy: In other words, you've officially joined the ranks of such pathetic losers as none other than Razor himself. Razor: Shut up, Ruudboy. You're stupid. Regardless of your "addicted-to-the-Internet" status, we think working for this website must be a lot of fun, especially when you get to poke fun at each other on Just D'oh It every month. However, we also think we've uncovered something very sinister going on behind the scenes. ***insert scary-sounding music here*** Ruudboy: We think you guys are secretly working for FOX, and like whenever someone visits this website and downloads a file or sends in a submission or like posts a message in the fan forum, you guys like collect their names and send them straight to the twisted and demented execs at FOX, because FOX is one of the most evil corporations in the world and they're out to destroy all Simpsons fans and take all the fun out of watching TV and put the fun into a jar and keep the fun on a shelf somewhere in the back room. I'm serious! Razor: He really is serious, you know. They started out by forcing the producers of "The Simpsons" to hire crummy writers so that people would stop watching the show. And now, in an even bigger coup, they've seized control of Evergreen Terrace! Good Lord, will they stop at nothing? Sick freaks! We're never working for you again!!! ***storms out of the room in anger, knocking over a priceless Ming dynasty vase in the process*** Ruudboy: Agghhh! My priceless Ming dynasty vase! That cost me over three dollars! Well, uh, we've gotta go now. - Razor and Ruudboy

Thano : I just want to let you know that we are not working for Fox Enterprises. And be assured that both of my legs were broken in a terrible accedent unrealated to Rocco or Franky, the Fox hired goons. Also, I would like to say, by no influence from anything, that Fox is the best network on TV, and they should rule the world. Sound very sincere. Oh crap, I wasn't suppose to read that...

RHETT: I think what Thano and Lee have together is beautiful and romantic, except for the fact that Lee is carrying Russ' child. LISA: And of course, all of you worship Eric McKeon, the Sideshow Bob King! All hail Eric McKeon, and his terrific Sideshow Bob website! And Eric Wirtanen, the demi-god in charge of janitorial work here. And the head slave-master. RHETT: Oh, and Russ, Nate Gilmore is cheating on you for Michael, who is also cheating on you (Russ) for...HIMSELF!!! LISA: And in answer for #4, we think Sideshow Bob and Elizabeth Hoover should get married. - Lisa and Rhett Lavin, the eeeeeeeevil twins

Eric : I can think of at least thirteen things wrong with that submission... and at least twenty comments that would drive Thano to insanity.

For Just D'Oh It#6, I would like "Kidrock" to be in the simpsons and his role would be "American Bad Asses Rule"! - Ryan Markwith

Eric : First of all, Kid Rock was already on The Simpsons. Secondly, they would never invite him back. And third, Thano goes insane when you mention past editions.
Michael : Thank God he's still in the bathroom doing his thing.
Thano : *opens the door* WHAT THE F(&^ IS WRONG WITH YOU GODDAMNED MOTHERF**&^%$# RETARDS! I SHOULD KICK THE F*&^ OUTTA YOU! DOESN'T ANYONE F*&(ING LISTEN TO ME! Now, if you'll excuse me *closes the door*

Well... aside from working on the website, I believe that the mantainers of this website spend their day in a variety of ways. They start off with breakfast, as always, of donuts or two year old orange juice. In the morning, they travel to Springfield (God only knows how they get there) and talk to the residents, obtaining information and such. For lunch they eat at Krusty Burger, or some other grease pit. After lunch, they step back into the real world, and update the site. After this, the firemen arive, having seen the smoke caused by the maintainers actually thinking... For dinner, whatever's in the fridge... ya don't wanna know specifics. After dinner, out to scare people with simpsons imitations. Then, bed, on top of a pile of money, as McBain would say... - Sanchez the 007 eliminator

Thano : My money bed is getting flat. Eric, do something about this.
Eric : Not now, we need to throw more money into the fire. Getting kinda cold in here. *starts burning the money*
Nate : Noooooooooo! *jumps into the fire, attempting to save the money* Agh, my eyes. The goggles do nothing!

I think that you want to give me money. - AkiWombat

Thano : No, I don't believe that I do.
Michael : I'm gonna agree with Thano on that one.
Justin : *Pulls out wallet* .....waaaait a minute...
Eric : Now Justin, you had the sex, and ya hafta pay for the sex. It's only fair.
AJ : He thought the cop was a prostitute.

You work 8 hours a day, but you take a 7 hour break. During that 7 hour break, you watch porn and get high. At the end of the day, you go to eat at Hooters and later go to a strip club where you get drunk, start a fight between yourselves and get arrested. On the morning, the police releases you and you are ready for another day, working at ET. - GasolineSniffingBarny

Thano : Hooters is a family resturant, it has a kids menu and everything. So what if the waitresses are all women and they have large breasts which is the only way they get hired? I mean, I know that most of the ET workers are regulars. The fact that most of us our perverts has nothing to do with that either. We just like the food. That's it, food. Yeah.
Michael : We go to Hooters for the food!?
Justin : Eric does.
AJ : Well, Justin can't come. He's been barred ever since the chicken wing "incident" last year.

I don't know what you do all day, but I'm sure it has a lot to do with maintaining a state of "assal horizontallogy". - S.G.

Eric : I hear that Justin types while maintaining a state of assal horizontallogy, but that could just be a wild rumor.
Michael : I think it's true. I also heard that he "likes" his cousins.
Justin : *Tries to think of witty comeback, fails*
AJ : Well this is just one of the many failures that will occur in Justin's life.

Three words. "Monkeys typing on typewriters". - What a Silly Bunt

Thano : Eric's a monkey? That would explain the constantly trying to pick things out of my hair.
Eric : Gimme a banana. Banana, banana, banana!
Justin : *Reads from sheet* It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times....you stupid monkeys!
Russ : *bites Justin*

I believe the associates at Evergreen Terrace would polish Stampy's tusks and feed him canvas bags of peanuts to prep him for this months prize. - Ryan Markwith

Eric : Feed Stampy? Oh my God, I forgot. Holy crap, the elephant's got Russ in his mouth! Oh well... it isn't too much of a loss.

I think you would start the day off with a spot of tea with lemon juice in it, followed by crumpets with the queen. Then of course you would take a trip to Disneyland, which you secretly own, and ride every single ride to make sure they are working. Unfortunatly, one of the rides malfunctions and you all fall to bloody deaths. Then Mickey Mouse resurects you, so everything is peachy once more. Then you all take a trip to the local orphanage and give the children the crumpets you didn't finish. You then fly over to a movie set in Hollywood to drop off Harrison Ford's Smurfs lunchbox, which he forgot at one of your houses last night. By then, it's pretty late and you realized you forgot to update Evergreen Terrace, so you throw some crap together and go to bed. - Gee

Thano : Homer could kick Mickey's ass.
Justin : I could kick Harrison Ford's ass.
Harrison Ford : Help me, Chewie!
Chewbacca : Rowaaaaar! *chews on Justin*
AJ : *Hands Chewbacca a laxative* Here, you may need those later.

The Winner: I think that working for Evergreen Terrace would be best expressed in a movie, titled "Evergreen Terrace: "The Reverse Stairway to Hell" directed by Alan Smithee. And in full technicolor...in film noir... scenes from the movie. (Limo pulls up on curb...Thano walks out of Limosuine and walks into a dark warehouse) Thano: Lee... LIGHTS!!! (Lights turn on, Lee runs in.) Thano: Let the slaves... I mean writers out of their cages. I want new contests and fast... And get me some breath mints, Lee. Lee: I think you've had enough breath mints... um... sir. Thano: I'll TELL you when I've had enough! Lee: I have a suggestion... couldn't we all work from our homes, like Eric does. Thano: The internet isn't ment to be worked on COMPUTERS!!! It's a cat eat cat world out there... Lee: Isn't it dog eat dog instead of... Thano: From now on, It's cat eat cat... anyone who says otherwise will DIE. Lee... do you want to be forced to do more embarrasing and humiliating replies? Well do you? Lee: No!!! Thano: Good. Now get Russ and Dave out of their cages before they die. They're painting my house today. In the other parts, Space Coyote finds out her father is Darth Vader, and they duel in a fight with telepathics. Thano goes into rehab, and release Russ and Dave from their cages. Lee escapes to Canada to avoid the Draft for the Vietnam War after finding a time machine. Eric finds out about the warehouse and shuts down it permanately, setting all the squirells who make counterfiet Timex wathces free. Led Zepplin and Jimi Hendrix's spirit could cameo. - Kris Lentz

Thano : Hahahaha, give this man the 10,000 dollars!
Michael : That's some good stuff, but Eric is the person who paints our houses.
Eric : All of this cheap paint is making me dizzy.
Justin : Just a reminder that my first feature film, "How Justin Got His Groove Back", premieres this Christmas.
Eric : He's single, ladies.
AJ : Not for long.
Eric : Huh? ... oh God, no.

Conclusion : Over half of you guessed that we are 16 year old fat, sweaty, computer nerds who watch The Simpsons, download pornography, and sleep all day long. Well, mister, that's only the half truth.