Remember when I said I'd post the video in this blog? I lied. I was set to, but then yesterday happened, and I never made a blog. Yesterday was all around shit-tacular. I try to ride my bike in the snow to work and it takes forever. When I get there, there's me and one other person, the usual morning guy. We shovel for like 2-3 hours. I don't really feel like talking only about work, so I'll put down the other two main reasons why. ...
I just realized something. My voice is instantly recognizable. And my voice has not developed at all... When I speak, I fear people will recognize me. I need the community to answer me this? Does anything I do on the internet matter? Does any demerit I earn on the internet matter? If you knew my past, would you still accept me? And would things get worse if I reveal myself? ...
Everywhere I go they're the same people. So why can't I use the name before. Because these people know who I am. Why can't I do what I want to do using an alias. Why can't I face the fear and use that name? I know that these are people. So why can't I do it? *sigh*
I said today would be the day I put up that video, but I also said if I got a minimum 4 comments every blog. Actually I think I said that yesterday's blog; whatever. Being the 'nice' guy I am, I'll probably post the video tomorrow or Sunday. Depends how nice I'm feeling and if you guys are feeling lucky. I work later today, 5 hours. 5:30-10:30. Not too bad. Unfortunately I work tomorrow morning 7:30-1:45, so I'm probably not getting much sleep tonight. The good news is I don't work ...
You know what I realized. That fame is only temporary, that you'll never have a certain skillset for a certain amount of time and that everything you have currently could go away in a second. I don't know if it was ever possible to keep this; the name, the respect, the companionship but I know that the limelight isn't exactly reasonable. It seems like whatever I'm going to do today/tomorrow will put all of this in jeopardy; let me just say that this is the closest I'll get to social interaction ...
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